I put up some new photos on the family pages as well as my favorites album. Of note is that newest chronologically are at the bottom. So uh, it’s entirely possible that if you don’t scroll down, you’ll never notice changes.

Why do I do it that direction? Because it seems to me that when you start a showing where time is a factor, you should start at the beginning, no? OK so it makes sense chronologically, but yeah it’s missin’ the mark as far as new visitors are concerned. Moral? You should be checking the albums with frequency. Just in case…



Nice Day. Bad burn.
It always seems to play that way, and wouldn’t you know it today was not the exception that defines the rule.

We had to go shopping this morning first off, because we had been sustaining on peanut butter & jelly sandwiches & quesadillas for the last 3 days, and when we ran out of cheese & peanut butter yesterday, we knew we were kinda up the proverbial creek without the proverbial paddle.

So yeah. It was overcast this morning, and we thought that it was going to just be a day of general gloom, when all of a sudden around 11:30a, the sky just sort of opened up like Madden was behind a TelePrompTer somewhere screaming “boom!” We decided that we’d take the opportunity to go to the beach with the puppies.

Well a nice day it was, and we sort of lost track of time and next thing you know, we’re burned. She on her legs, me on my shoulders. Nice. Oh and that’s not all, either. I also managed to cut the bottom of my foot somewhere along the lines. It’s a nice slit, straight & smooth, so I must have found a piece of glass somewhere.

The foot I can bandage and not worry about. The burning, I think that’ll sting a bit, for a while.



Cars
We watched Cars last night. You know, that animated schtick by Pixar? Yeah that. Well it’s visually stunning, what they can do with animation these days (on a Mac!). But I must say that as cute as it was, it was almost too cute. I just found most of it rushed & corny. And what is up with Larry the Cable Guy? Can we like, fire him from life? He’s not funny. His character could have been dialed down like 10 clicks and it would have made the movie 10 clicks better, I think. It's over. get him done. Geezus already....

I hear Ratatouille is supposed to be great, too. I really really hope it’s not as corny as Cars was. C-.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment

So today the Mexican President attended the funeral of one of his former top heads in his war against drug cartels. A few hours before the funeral, a senior detective was gunned down by seven bullets to his head & neck, and two other top police officers have also been murdered over the span of a few days.

Safe to say that the drug cartels are in charge? Wonder what has to be done. I guess it’s rough ousting the former ruling party, eh? Very sad.



The Many pains of Jujutsu
Today I had initially planned to get home from work, and then work out my legs. In reality, I got home from work, and worked out my eyelids. Because I was tired, and my legs were more-so.

My knees. My knees felt like they were suspended in pudding or something. They were slow, felt swollen, and just sort of ached a little. No real pounding pain, but it just didn’t feel like my good ol’ knees in general.

My leg muscles. My butt was sore, as were my calfs. I sort of figured my calfs would be sore from all the toe-curling action during the kicks and takedowns, but I didn't figure on the butt. So I in effect got my leg workout on already, albeit a day early.

Oh, and my foot. My left foot I think I sprained the top of it. The top of it? Yeah, the top. I was doing some rolls yesterday as practice, and I rolled onto and then over the top of my left foot, and I heard some popping. I made it through the rest of the class, but when I got home I could tell that it was probably going to be a little sore today. And I was right.

Oh well. Such is life. I feel pretty good overall, especially after my nap. Tomorrow I begin class at 11am. Hopefully I sleep well tonight. Will need it.



Tired?
Yeah. Remember we watched “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford” last night. Well I mentioned it was long? Couple that with the fact that we didn’t actually start it until closer to 10pm. I don’t recommend that, should you find yourself in a similar situation.



The Girl’s changing climate wrt Pit Bulls
For the longest time The Girl has maintained that pit bulls are not inherently dangerous, that they are trained to be a certain way.

I have not believed this myself during this time. The truth of the matter is that pit bulls are involved in more bites & attacks than any other dog type. For me, it’s safe to say that the same as labradors are instinctively drawn to water & swimming, as are pit bulls to aggressiveness. I mean, that may not always have been the case, they weren’t always supposed to be killer dogs, and in fact they do have some stigma that is not deserved (German Shepherds actually bite harder, and both pale in comparison to the Rottweiler). But the fact is that today’s pit bulls are not by rule friendly family dogs as they once were, sad as it may be.

I attributed this defensive posture of The Girl to the fact that her dog is figured to be part pit bull of some fashion, most likely American Staffordshire Terrier, which is is commonly grouped with pit bulls (duh). Yes, she’s cute, no she’s not much a threat, but that doesn’t change the rule. It might just help define it, know what I mean?

Anyway, those feelings & defenses have eroded over the past few months. First she had her mom inform her that her cat had been killed when someone brought over their “friendly” pit bull and it chased down the feline and essentially ate it. The cat was some 20 years old or thereabout. Then just tonight, she found out a coworker friend of hers had her dog killed by someone’s “friendly” pit bull at a party both dogs attended.

Not only that, but we had also read recently in the paper about some dogs that had been attacked & killed by someone’s “friendly” family pit bull at the beach. Twice. In February.

I think it’s safe to say that The Girl is ready to admit that perhaps there’s something to the idea that pit bulls are in fact inherently dangerous pets. In the same way that Labradors are inherently perfect family dogs. It’s in the breed, I’m sorry.

Peace.

Tags: Gym, Entertainment, Politics

So yesterday we learned/practiced some parrying moves & throws. They felt natural and good.

Tomorrow, I will conquer the class and then move to take over the world with my newfound abilities.



The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford
I know that’s a mouthful, but it is actually, really-truly, the title of a movie that came out around October 2007. It stars Angelina Jolie’s supposedly handsome boyfriend, Brad Pitt.

It was a long movie. We started it last night because The Girl got home early and we were bored. It was a decently-good movie. The acting was good, and it kept you engaged, though it was what I might call a “quiet” film. I also saw for the second time in 3 movies the face of Casey Affleck. He did the part well.

I found the film slightly humorous in the way that it was framed. Well, humorous and enlightening.

I mean, “The Assassination” of Jesse James, by the “Coward” Robert Ford. So you know, Jesse James, the robber and murderer, was “assassinated” by the “Coward” who brought his reign to an end. Seems backwards, right? But that was the lore. James was like a Robin Hood in the tales. He wasn’t, and he killed innocent people, but that was apparently a lost point in the stories of the bandit.

So yeah, it was long & quiet, but overall well done. I say it gets a solid B.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment

Oh yeah! Totally forgot to mention the whole Iron Man thing.

It was a decent movie. I was surprised by the good reviews for it. I mean, it was an action/adventure, Superhero movie, you know? Anyway, the free tickets.

So yeah, a few months ago The Girl got these ticket coupons at work in lieu of a tip. Well, in lieu of a cash-money sort of tip, as it were. Well this was good and bad. Firstly it was good, because this was the free trip to see Iron Man, thereby alleviating the frustration of waiting to see it on Blu-Ray. Yay! Movie night out, and a decent show at that!

The movie was very appealing visually. I thought the special effects that they used were very well done. Contrast this with I Am Legend (not), which couldn’t special effect its way out of a paper bag. The story good enough, and even had a moral point that is completely relevant to today’s politics. And there was hot chicks, yeah baby! Many online have lauded Mr. Downey’s acting on the piece as worth the price of admission alone. I would say he didn’t screw anything up, and in fact wasn’t bad at all, but I’m not going to go so far as to say that it’s on par with Christian Bale’s rendition of Bruce Wayne in the new Batman franchise or anything, huh?

My only real gripe about the movie was that it was short. I mean it was slightly over 2 hours, but it felt short, and the end felt rushed. They could have used more of Iron Man in action, I felt. That would have been super-cool, they had pulled off the visuals right, they should have put more on the screen, you know? Give us 30 more minutes of Iron Man doing Iron Man stuff. We’ll love you for it!

Overall, I’d have to say that it’s a flat-B movie, on the verge of B+. Give us more action in the Blu-Ray release, and I’ll give you the coveted “+”.



The Bad side of the free tickets
Oh yeah, remember that? There was a downside to the free tickets. You see, these tickets were a $30 value, and included more than admission. We also got 2 large drinks, a large popcorn, and a large candy (which was medium at best, who are they trying to kid?) I didn’t have a problem with the popcorn or candy, but the drinks? Oh my, the drinks.

I damn near missed the last half of the movie. I had to pee so bad. I was doing the pee-pee dance in my seat. I had to tinkle oh so very badly. It was not right. I mean, where do they get off giving people drinks so big that they only serve to test the outer limits of your bladder?

Thankfully I did make it through the movie without peeing myself. Made it all the way to the bathroom actually, which I was very proud of. And there I peed so long that I almost fell asleep. You seen A League of Their Own? Yeah it was like Tom’s "performance" in that, except longer and without the breaks. It was an amazing feat, you should have been there.



Definitely worth the wait on Blu-Ray though
So about 10 minutes into the movie, the movie stops. The lights come on, the pre-movie stuff starts playing. Again. People in the audience were like, “is that it?” Yes you idiot, you paid $9 to see 15 minutes of movie and not ONE single Iron Man suit. Jeez people are dumb sometimes. DAMN!!!!...

Anyway, it starts back up once they figure out that they broke it (not sure how). The only thing was I think we missed 30 seconds to a minute’s-worth of movie. They were on the same scene, but different characters were on the screen than before, and in mid-sentence of something that I didn’t catch. Maybe Iron Man was gay? I just don’t know for sure now, and might not until it comes out on disc.



The VERY VERY End of the movie: Easter Egg?
I heard that if you wait past all the credits, there’s like a gold mine or something. A very cool gag-reel or something like that. Well they lied. There was something, but it was not really worth waiting for. So I’ll just spoil it for you right now, save you the time.

At the end, Iron Man comes home to Samuel Jackson, who’s the leader of SHIELD, the agency that tried to help cover up the tracks of Iron Man. He wants to talk to him about joining a program called “AVENGER.” This is comic book gold apparently, if you care. I don’t. They’ll either make a sequel or they won’t. Time will tell, not some slop at the end of the credits.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment

So we had time yesterday to pop Juno in and give it a go-around. You know, it’s that movie that has a young high school girl getting pregnant, and shenanigans ensue. No, not Saved!, that movie was funnier. This is the less-funny version.

It’s not bad, and I think it could have actually been better than Saved!, if only it had lost a little bit of the “edgy” dialogue in lieu of some more refined dialogue. See, I get that they’re young and all, and they maybe talk a little different, but it felt like the characters were forcing crap to escape their gums; it had no flow. It was not believable. I do not expect my 7-11 clerk to tell me my “Eggo is Preggo.”

And see the whole premise is that this young girl acts more mature than her age would imply. Except that damn language! She manages to sound like a 9 year-old that watches too much Nickelodeon in the most inappropriate of spots. Like meeting the family she’s going to let adopt her kid. That whole scene needed to be reshot, minus the schtick, in my opinion.

But hey, I say it wasn’t bad still. Those are just where they could have improved it some. It’s OK. I don’t see it as the dark horse of the year or anything though. It was an ‘alright’ flick that got maybe even more coverage than it deserved, I thought. I give it a B-. Hey I’m a generous soul.



Jujutsu
Ah yes, before the movie began, there was that; jujutsu. I had mentioned signing up for this before, right? Well last night was ‘the night,’ as it were. I got to go go my first class, and look like a royal ass and make “HEE-YAA!” sounds all over the place, and generally accomplish nothing, whilst still being sore to show for it.

Ought to be fun!

I’m not actually that sore, except for a spot on my hip joint that I could feel popping over and over again on a specific move we were learning. The Move? “The Samurai Walk.” The use? Looking silly. No really, that’s it. I hurt myself on a maneuver designed to make you look silly.

Could maybe be why I didn’t like Juno as much; perhaps I was too busy looking at all the characters, thinking “I could totally juju his ass to hell.”

Hey I can’t help it anymore; I’m now a highly-trained death machine.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment, Animals

Avoid Wheat flour at all costs. Remind The Girl to avoid wheat flour at all costs.

See it happened like this: She wanted to try something new, something healthier than our bleached (yet still 100%-Organic), white, plain ol’ flour. Fine I said, how bad can it be? They’re derivatives of one another. Go for it. This was two days ago. This morning before I had to go to work, I figured we could have pancakes that she would make for me (see how that works?). So “we” got hard at work making them and getting them ready.

We should have known almost immediately – and thinking back, we kinda did – that they were going to taste like crap as we were cooking them. They just didn’t cook the same, you know? They looked like crap. Like, literally. Like someone had a “runny day” over the skillet or something, which was not aided by the fact that we put chocolate chips in them. Anyway. We sit down to eat them and sure enough they taste as bad or worse than they look. It was like eating stale, past-its-prime sawdust or something. It was bad.

What was worse that The Girl informed me she had had worse. I couldn’t believe such a thing existed and demanded she tell me where the hell she’d had pancakes worse than these. Turns out?

She had eaten wheat flour pancakes recently at a restaurant with some friends. Which really makes me wonder… if she’s had wheat flour pancakes before, and knew they sucked, why would she decide we need wheat flour for our pancakes? I do not have an answer to this question.

Color me perplexed.

Sigh. I know where Zoey gets it, I guess ;-)



A Good Onion
I have known about it for some time, but I rarely make time to stop by and take a gander at all the wonderful “news” items they have available.

I am referring to The Onion News Network. Check out the videos. They’re a riot. Especially nuggets like this one. And This one. And so on; you get it.

Peace.

Tags: women, Entertainment

I worked my arse of last night at work (of all places to do such a thing), and started feeling rather run-down as the night progressed. I hoped it was just that the long day had taken its toll on me, as I had gotten up early to take the dogs out, then gotten home and began a vigorous shoulder workout, then cleaned myself up to go to work and dog myself there, too.

Secretly though, I feared I was getting what The Girl was giving to me. B*tch.

She had started to feel ill a few days ago, and I tried to keep my distance. But I’m a man, and nature calls us on occasion, sick or not. Damn my lover ways, next thing I know I’m sick too. What a way to ruin a weekend off. Damn that woman; she’s such a giver.



Across the… the… LIVING ROOM!
Since The Girl is not feeling all that well, she decided to get her shift covered tonight. Since I’m off too and not feeling all that great myself, we’re going to sit back, relax, eat ice cream and watch a movie. On the agenda? Across the Universe. The reviews have been all over the map, with some calling it a masterpiece, and it looks a little odd. What the heck though, right? Netflix is workin’ OK, so I figure that we’ll put it on the queue, and see what happens. Maybe it'll be the next Shawshank.

I’ll be sure to report back to all the people that don’t read my blog anyway so you won’t know how the movie is.



More Proof The Mighty Dollar owns our Gov’t
Here’s a nice link to a blog post on the cosumerist that summarizes the state of personal taxes and corporate taxes now, years past, and into the future.

Hey these are figures BY the government; I’m not making this sh!t up.

Peace.

Tags: Politics, Entertainment

If you’ve seen the first one, you’ve seen the last one, only better. There’s things that strike me, though.

Like, how full of himself Mr. Stallone must really be. I mean, he really wants people to root for him real bad. He wants to be everyone’s hero, which I can understand myself, but man… 6 movies? About a chump named Rocky? More than anything, it seemed to me that Rocky 7,000 or whatever was mostly a vehicle for him to show us how good the HGH is doing for him.

It wasn’t bad, but there was some corny sh!t. Like, stuff that was just in there so show a soft spot or to justify #7,001 or whatever episode this was. Aw, his wife died. Aw, his kid is a chump. Aw, he still hangs out with his wife’s loser brother. Well sh!t, take your shirt off and beat a black man! That’ll make it all better!

Speaking of chump kids, this Milo Guy is really kind of a shitty actor. I mean, he kinda gets by as a two-bit act on Heroes (that Lost Clone I no longer watch), but to me it seemed he really stunk up the big screen. It wasn’t all his fault, they wrote him in as a real bitch of a character, but he didn’t help matters any. Every time he spoke I felt that I should yawn or change the channel or something, look for a commercial maybe. Kinda hard when you’re watching a disc.

It’s completely passable. And by that I do not mean that it passes as a watchable flick so much as I mean that it can totally be bypassed and not only will life continue to dredge on, but it might actually be a little rosier. I’ll give it some bonus points for the Rocky Theme Music, because that totally rocks, but still it’s pulling up the rear with a paltry D+.



Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
We rented this movie because I stumbled across it on the list of available titles. We had wanted to see it when it first came out, but somehow managed to forget about it entirely. What a shame too, because it’s actually quite good!

Well it was to me, anyway. The Girl did not so much care for it as the random bob did. I thought it was darkly funny, had a good story that kept you engaged, and the acting was overall well-acted…? No but it was, with the possible exception of the main character. Robert Downey Jr is a passable actor, but having seen him in this and also A Scanner Darkly recently, I can’t figure out why they went and cast him for the lead in the upcoming Iron Man movie. It still looks hella-cool, but I’m just not sure that he’s the best choice for it is all. He was annoying enough as a supporting character in “Darkly,” and although better in “Bang Bang,” I could see someone else doing a better job.

Anyway, back to Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Look, I think you should see it. It’s got a good plot. The acting’s good. And if you care or need it, there’s a hot chick in it that bares her breasts. I didn’t think it needed it, but hey I’m not going to turn my eyes, either. It may not change cinema, but not many do. Still though, A solid “A”-film I think.



American Psycho
Where to begin with this movie. I just don’t know…. OK, got it.

The acting was good. It has a decent-enough cast, headed up by Christian Bale, whom I hate out of pure jealousy (him & Ryan Reynolds). And he delivers a great performance. But the thing was, I just didn’t care. As in, despite the good shows, nothing really drew me in. I just didn’t care about what was happening on the screen. Not a lick. Was kinda hoping it would end soon so I could just go to bed or something.

Now who’s fault is that? The storywriters? The Director? Editors? Maybe all. I just don’t know really, I can’t put my finger on what exactly it was that I didn’t really care about. I mean I guess it’s perhaps that there’s no real development of the main character. They introduce him as being crazy and knowing it, but there’s no background as to why he’s this way. And you watch the movie, sort of thinking that there will be some sort of climax and resolution (as this is typically what makes a story tick). Yet there is none. It ends. And worse, it ends and leaves you with questions that aren’t even hinted at through the film.

Was he crazy? Did he just imagine all the things he did? Did he do them and people just covered up for him? Hard to say, kind of ambiguous. Hellaciously ambiguous, actually. And that always irks me. There’s a rare few films I like that leave you “guessing” at the end. You have to do it right. Total Recall comes to mind (was it all real? Or was it the dream he asked for?). Basic Instinct was OK. I don’t know, it seems there’s a ton of films in the wasteland that tried to pull it off and failed. And to that list, I have to add American Psycho.

I can’t rate it any better than a straight C. It’s not that good. But if you had to sit and watch it, you could. Just, uh, try not to notice the hooker’s horrible haircut. It’s bad. Real bad.



And that concludes our Movie Reviews…
I thought I’d through these up right quick, before I had to come and say that I had no seen 4 movies and not said anything about them. Tonight after dinner we watch The Usual Suspects. It stars Kevin Spacey, back when we was making good movies instead of crap movies. I’ve seen it before, but it’s been a long time, and quite honestly I wasn’t following along all that well at the time. Hey, I was young and stupid then.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment, hate

Yeah it’s true, random bob & The Girl are gettin’ cultured and sh!t! Ain’t that the damnedest!

We’ve actually been planning it awhile now. Well not really. Kinda. Kinda-sorta. Anyway. See what it was is that we love the idea of going to these types of concerts (Mozart’s on tap tonight). We’ve never actually been though. But there’s a really nice theatre in town and we wanted to make time for it at some point, so we put into our calendar some events they had in their calendar. Just so happens that last week it became apparent that this event and our schedules collided; we had the time & the opportunity, so we pulled the trigger and bought us some tickets.

Mozart better be damn good after all this trouble! Ha. Hey I know he’s good it was just a joke, c’mon. I have tons of Mozart in my iTunes library. Yeah. Culture, see?



Retraining myself
Nothing special or important. I’ve been a heavy mouse user even since the day I opted for laptop over desktop. Today I decided that it’s really not that more convenient. I’m trying to retrain myself to use the trackpad instead.

So far it’s going OK. Not great, just OK. And I’m not sure how much of that is due to the fact that in the back of my mind, I know the mouse is only a hand’s grab away.



Random bob gets published online (somewhere else)
I recently had an issue with a certain credit card company. Armed Forces Bank, this one’s for you!

You see, I started my credit history with them. But they make it so difficult to get a better limit or rate that I just never bothered, I mean hell I have like 10 credit cards, so what’s the point? I just stopped using theirs for the most part, breaking it out occasionally so that it would still be valid and have a history. Well I left a small credit balance on there for some months without thinking much of it. Then I used the card after a long hiatus. Well come to find out what I owed didn’t match my books! Turns out they had “written off” my credit balance.

So basically, I left them in charge of a few cents of mine, and then they stole it from me. This didn’t seem right, and when I called they essentially said they would not help me unless I paid $3 a month for all the months backwards of the last 3 for research costs. Nice. Well they stole my money, then tried to get me to pay more money to have them tell me they stole my money, and I cancelled. And then sent a line to The Consumerist. You may have heard of them before, I have a link on the side of the page there and I think most everyone ought to read it daily.

Well, wouldn’t you know it? They eventually ran with my story. Turns out AFB isn’t the only ones doing it, as another gent got the same treatment from Wachovia.

So uh, yeah. Check your statements closely. Apparently rolling in money won’t stop your banks from stealing your pocket-change.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment

I have seen three movies since last I updated; you’ll notice that there haven’t been any reviews. They are forthcoming.

What were the special flicks? One was Rocky Balboa, another was Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, and the other was American Psycho.



How they came to be
The first two showed up as they should have, from Netflix. The third was a surprise last night, as we didn’t have any movies scheduled to show up. And it wasn’t from Netflix.

When we bought our Blu-Ray Player oh-so long ago, they were running a promotion for 5 free movies. Hell I like free. So yeah we filled out the paperwork, sent away… and waited. And waited some more. We waited for so long we damn-near forgot that at some point we were supposed to get free movies.

Until yesterday, when they finally showed up. Yay us!



The others are… (drumroll please)
We also received Chain Reaction, S.W.A.T., Swordfish, & The Prestige. All except for The Prestige are born losers, of course. This was not our fault.

5 free movies sounds like a lot of fun. Except they don’t give you any 5 free movies of your choice. Oh no, they have 5 “categories,” if you will, and you have to select one from each of the 5 “categories,” as they were. Now these aren’t “categories” as in Horror, Action, etc. No, these are “categories” like A- choose from these 4 sucky movies, B-choose from these 7 sucky movies, C-choose from these 5 corny-ass sucky movies, etc.

So as you see, we did the best we could. Hey I’m just glad something the caliber of The Prestige was even on the list.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment, hate

A few nights ago (as I was making the bed to get in and sleep the night away), I got a call. It was a good friend of The Girl’s, and she called to tell me/us that she was going to be celebrating her birthday that night, and she was to be having this bash at The Tip Top Club. The Tip Top Club is a local (the only) strip club around these parts.

She’s bisexual, by the way. Yes, she’s every guy’s dream girl. Well, half of the dream, at least.

So The Girl went. Which means, she’s now been to a strip club, whereas I have not. See the irony? My girl has been to the titty bar to see hot, naked women rub up on everyone. I have not. This is just too weird.

I would have gone, but I had to be at work @ 6:30am the next morning. The call came in around 11:30pm. Wasn’t in the cards.



This is why women are so much cooler than men, btw
Okay, so imagine a couple (heterosexual, please). Now, imagine that they are gearing up for a night out. Never, I repeat, never, would a girl bring up an idea that involved a place with men stripping to nothing and both would enjoy it.

It does seem to work the other way, though. You can take your girl to an establishment that involves scantily-clad women getting non-clad and rubbing themselves on you. Everyone is happy.

Yes, women rock.



In the “Strange Things” department
The Girl got home around 3:30am and felt like chatting. Apparently seeing lots of nipples helps you forget that your significant other has to work early the next morning. Anyway. So we’re chatting and she tells me that they didn’t serve alcohol there. I think it came up when I asked how plastered everyone got, and made sure she wasn’t drinking then driving. Anyway. The don’t serve alcohol. Yep. Not even a titty bar, I guess, what with no “bar” and all.

The Girl said that she thought it helped keep customers from getting out of control. I agreed, but it creates another problem: lost profits. Drunk people spend more. So, more tips. More money on booze. You know, because drunk people may not like $4 beer at first, but a few later and it seems like a great deal!

The next day, The Girl is poking around on the web, looking for information on the club. And here’s the “Strange Things” hook: They’re an RV sales lot. Yeah, no joke. They sell RV’s, apparently.

You see, they are not serving alcohol because they’re not zoned to serve alcohol there; it’s technically an RV sales lot. And all those naked women shoving faces in crotches?

Sales girls.

Man, I LOVE this place! And I haven’t even been there!

Peace.

Tags: women, Entertainment

We ran out of things to do on Monday night, so we popped into the video store down the street and rented Atonement. It’s set in WWII-era England, involving a love story gone awry. Two lovers, torn apart by the vindictive accusations of a little girl, separated by time in jail and a horrific war, but most of all by the jealousy of a young girl.

It’s a good movie almost all the way around. We were actually warned by The Girl’s grandmother just before we sat to plop it in, that it a) wasn’t all that good, and b) there was some ‘raunchy’ sex scene in a kitchen. Now, we usually take movie recommendations from her with a grain of salt, if not a shaker-full. Good thing, too because she wasn’t quite right on either front. Firstly, the movie’s not that bad. It’s overall a fairly well-done flick, if a little rough at the end.

Secondly, the raunchy sex scene? In the Library, not the kitchen. And furthermore, it wasn’t even raunchy! Odd perhaps, but far from raunchy. I’ve seen raunchier on TV. This was not raunchy. It was actually kind of understated & intriguing.

For me, the worst part of the movie was the ending. You go along with the story, you hope they find each other, then it seems they did. But then you quickly learn that they never did, they died, and the part you just saw was the imagination of the vindictive little girl – now 143 years old – in her new novel, Atonement, an “autobiography” of her horrible act. She explains in an interview that those moments were in fact how she wrote it out of her imagination, to give them the time together they never had (because the died, victims of the war, a continent apart).

That sucks enough, but then she keeps talking, and it keeps sucking more. Oh now she tells us that she doesn’t think of it as a cheap ploy, a copout, she thinks its what they would have wanted. You know, for her to be a famous writer at the expense of their love & lives. Yeah, they wanted to die apart. So you could ‘imagine’ them together. Yeah.

Newsflash: It IS a cheap ploy. It WAS a copout. You ARE a raving bitch. And this catastrophic ending, in which you teased us with happiness – no, gave it to us and then ripped it from our grasp – was a complete disaster. We’d have rather have just received the bitter ending without the soft buildup.

But aside from the ending, it’s quite alright, cheerio! I’d give it a straight B.



F’ed up Celebrities we’re allowed to mention, part 2
So one star in this film is well-known for her good looks. Not so much known for her f*cked up eye, though. Yeah, Keira Knightley has a f*cked up eye I noticed, and again, it seems no one is allowed to mention it. It struck me – like, popped out of the screen and almost hit me – in a café scene where she meets her lover after a 3-year hiatus that he spent in prison. She’s standing there in her blue ‘thing’ that she’s wearing, and her face just fills up the screen with a “deer in the headlights” sort of look. And that’s when it almost hit me: her left eye is noticeably bigger and higher than her right. I mean, the camera was slightly off-center to her right, making that eye closer to the screen to begin with, yet still her left eye just dominated the screen. It was eerie. Or, well, eye-ie or something.

Not saying she’s not a beauty, no one’s perfect, but still, why can’t these things be mentioned?

I mean honestly, her eye doesn’t really bother me. But MAN, Joaquin’s f*cked up shoulders bug the living hell out of me.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment

Today’s movies are in large part not up to this task. It’s hard to remember the last movie I saw that I thought was good. The Departed? It was a good movie. What the hell do I recall since then? Well there was The Prestige that came out, but that was the same damn month in 2006 so that doesn’t count.

A SAMPLE MOVIES I DEARLY LIKE

• The Departed