You know those round little bugs you find in a garden that roll up into a ball when you poke at them? Roly-Polies, right? We all grew up loving the roly-poly, right? Well fueled by a recent desire to look absolutely everything up, which started with information hunting on Mosquito Hawks (which, btw, do NOT eat mosquitoes and are pests themselves – so kill on sight!), I found myself attached to my favorite laptop in search of info on roly-polies.


First trouble was that I had no idea how to spell roly-poly. Who knew? I figured that it’d have 2-l’s. Wrong. OK so I found out that it’s roly-poly, but that they are also commonly known as pill bugs, and some that don’t roll up known as sow bugs, are actually wood lice. And what’s even more interesting than that is, that they’re actually crustaceans! Yeah! They even breathe with gills, taking oxygen from water still. Fine dining in your backyard. Boil & crack, just like crab I guess.

Now I know. And now too, do you.



Overview: 3:10 to Yuma
I had the highest of hopes for this film going in, which can often be a recipe for disaster & disappointment (or disappointment & disaster). This film has superstars littered throughout, from leading men Russell Crowe to Christian Bale, to Peter Fonda and even featuring Luke Wilson for a short stint. Yeah, it’s packed.

It’s a gritty story about an average man trying to do right by his family, though he’s not outstanding in the least, and to the dismay of his sons, he’s not a superstar, and often makes decisions that they deem weak, lowering their father in their eyes. He takes the job of escorting a captured outlaw to Contention to catch a train to Yuma for trial mostly because he’s in desperate need of money to keep his farm afloat, and his family fed & with roof.

The acting is top-notch throughout, with strong performances from everyone. The only place I can complain about the acting is from that of Ben Foster, who plays Charlie Prince. I recognized him immediately as the asshole older brother from “Alpha Dog,” a movie that you may recall I didn’t quite enjoy immensely. And it’s not that I recognized the face so much as I recognized the character. Yeah, he’s the same exact guy here, same mannerisms, same speech, same everything, just subtract 140 years for period and add a beard & hat.

And while the characters had substantial depth & substance and the acting was quite good, for me there was still a lot missing or just inaccurate or inconceivable. Like for instance, the fact that they had Christian Bale talking as if he was born & raised in these scenes (Southwest US), when in fact his character is a recent transplant from the Boston area. Shouldn’t he have a Boston accent & speech patterns? And though I loved the complicated nature of the characters & motives, and the codes of honor and whatnot, there’s still a lot that simply doesn’t make sense except that it furthers the movie towards the preconceived climatic ending. And to me, that should never exist. If you’re putting a story together (pay attention, future screenwriters), there should never come a time when you’re introducing plot elements that don’t follow from the previous; it’s call the “deus ex machina,” and it’s basically insulting your audience in order to make it to the end of the story you already conceived, but now realize would be impossible to attain without some unexplainable, implausible notions and/or actions taking place.

Such as, say, the bad guy running where the good guy tells him to, even though the good guy’s being shot at by the bad guy’s buddies and baddy could really just turn a corner and be gone while the good guy gets swiss cheesed. Or the bad guy getting into a cell willingly, after there’s no one left to force him into it as they’re all dead, even though he’s been trying to escape for the last 2 hours (film time). Or the bad guy not shouting or making gestures to his buddies that are watching as the good guys try the ol’ bait-and-switch maneuver. All of which happen in this film, by the way.

So it’s sad to say that though it’s getting pretty glowing reviews all around, I’m not going to be on that side of the fence. A shame yes, as I like the actors & I think that pretty much all the performances were strong. Yea I cannot ignore the inconsistencies of the characters in those moments when they do something so stupid that it’s obvious only a movie character a la John Wayne would do that. As soon as they slap me in the face and insult me, I lose interest I guess.

Grade: C+



Feeling the Rhythm
For the last week or so, my right butt cheek (laugh it up) has been twitching non-stop. Funny to hear about I’m sure, not so funny to deal with when you’re trying to sleep. Or sit and concentrate. Or just sit.

I hope to god that it’s rhythm invading my body, and soon I’ll make a remarkable transformation from bad dancer to good dancer. Because that would totally justify the temporary (I hope it’s temporary) butt spasms. If not? Well I guess I’ll just have to find a good butt masseuse or something. I could dig that.

Peace.

Tags: Entertainment