It’s Finally here: The Abridged Script for The Dark Knight.
Read all about it. READ IT GODAMMIT! Yeah I liked the movie, yeah it’s pretty good, but c’mon, it’s got tons of folly to it. It’s riddled with plot holes & plot devices (that sounds sort of sexual, doesn’t it?) that are there because without them, the movie would just have to end at about the 45-minute mark, because it’s otherwise impossible to make the jump to the rest of the implausible story.

A friend and I yesterday were discussing our least-favorite things about it. He called shenanigans on the whole “Maggie falls from a building onto the top of a car and LIVES.” I still think that the Joker being OMNIPOTENT and knowing things no one could know in order to make a ridiculous set of plans work is the most shenanigan of all, however.

Favorite line from the Abridged Script?

HEATH LEDGER [to Maggie Gyllenhal @ party]
I can wait. Want to hear a story? Once upon a time, I had a wife. She was beautiful, like you. Er, no, I mean in complete contrast to you. You’re actually kind of a butterface. But at least you’re not Katie Holmes, I like that.
BAT-BALE
Then you’re gonna love me!

It’s so great because it digs so hard @ Katie Homely, then ties right back into the actual movie lines. It’s just brilliant.



Artists Avoiding iTunes because: Singles are cannibalizing Album Sales
Well duh. Look, I think it’s a sad statement to make that you’re keeping your music off iTunes (Kid Rock) because people don’t want to buy your entire album. You know what that essentially means? Your music is largely crap. You want me to buy an album instead of the two good songs on that album? How about this: don’t put two GOOD songs on an album and then fill it with absolute crap-as-filler. Try that. See if that works. Maybe album sales will go up if albums, you know, don’t suck.

If you’re of the mindset that I should own your entire CD to “understand” your music, then there’s something about your audience I think you should “understand”: We don’t care about your semi-rich people problems. We like one or two songs, we really only want those one or two songs. I don’t feel like paying you for sh!t I don’t like.

I know it’s weird, but how’s this for a trade: I’ll buy your crappy songs I don’t want, if you buy my crappy macaroni art that I glued onto some pieces of white paper that nobody wants. Deal?

F*cking Putzes.

Tags: hate

So remember those speaker wires? They may be relatively cheap to replace, but the thing is: I didn’t want to have to re-run all that wire. Because as it is now, it’s run through a series of clamps nailed into the back of the entertainment center-thingy which keeps all my wires neatly organized, and then run under a couple of floor strips, underneath a couch, underneath another floor strip, then around & along a wall to the speakers. So I figured what the hey, I will probably need some butt connectors (stop laughing) in the future, and some electrical tape, so I went to Ace to get the stuff necessary to repair the wires.

I hear, after all, that Ace is the Place (since 1974).

First aisle I come across is the Tape. Figured I didn’t really care about the particular order of things I got, just so long as I got everything on my short little list (note: butt connectors [stop laughing], electrical wire, double-sided tape to reattach the floor strips to the, uh, floor). So yeah, Tape aisle, here I come.

I get there, I take a look around, I see… tape. All kinds of tape! Duct tape! Duck tape. Plastic tape! Masking tape. Cloth tape! Wood tape. Double-sided mounting tape, even! I see all kinds of tape! Except of course, for electrical tape. Can’t find it. Search high, search low, can’t find it. Oh well, I figure, I’ll probably find some with the electrical connectors. Which, I did.

But here’s the thing: They don’t put Electrical tape on the tape aisle, but all the other kinds of tape? What’s so special about electrical tape, then? I mean, if you can’t put it on the “tape” aisle because you say it belongs with the electrical stuff it’s going to accompany, then why have Duct tape on the tape aisle? Why not stock that with the ducts? And Masking tape? Why not with the… the… masks? Oh wait, it’s for painting, right? OK, then how about with the paint supplies then, instead of the tape aisle? My point being, there’s absolutely no reason they could give as to why the electrical tape doesn’t belong on the tape aisle that doesn’t also equally apply to every other kind of tape they have in stock, that they still see fit to give a facing to on the damned Tape Aisle. So why not put the electrical tape there, too?

Stupidity, I figure. That and just to piss me off, maybe.

The Odd Thing About Sex Talk @ Work
We all want to talk about it, it seems. Funny, because we’re not supposed to talk about it. There’s rules & regulations that specifically state that you will be fired for talking about it. Which then, of course, makes everyone want to talk about it more.

I’ve never met one person – not one – that didn’t want to talk about sex with me at work. Er, that didn’t come out right. That didn’t want to talk with me about sex, while we were at work. Whew! You don’t want to know what would happen to me if I hadn’t fixed that before The Girl read it. Catastrophe.

Anyway. It just strikes me as odd that we have all these rules to prohibit this “thing” that we all do anyway. Doesn’t seem logical. I mean, I understand that there’s a line, we’re trying to avoid sexual harassment, but still. What if someone hates feet? They find them putrid? Should we write a law to prevent talk about foot stuff at work, too? Why can’t I legally talk about my collection of whips & chains? You know, I have this ring that... oh, never mind.



The Scary Thing About Sex Talk @ Work
Oh my god. A lot of the people that want to talk to me about sex at work? Ugly. Hey I may not be a 10, but at least I’m on the right side of that scale, bub. I mean, these are not the kind of people you find videos of having sex online. Know why? That’s right, because they’re ugly, like I freakin’ said already. So? Oh my god. These people are having sex? Oh god oh god, I hope not! And it’s not like I truly think that they should be denied the ability to have sex, it’s just a selfish thing on my part where I don’t want to imagine that an ugly person or (gasp!) two ugly people are having sex. It’s completely selfish on my part, I just don’t want to be all grossed out over it. And hell, you know what? Who am I kidding? I don’t want ugly people having sex! Because they’re just going to produce more ugly people, right? Right?

Of course, perhaps they’re just talking about it because they’re not getting it. Let’s hope. For the sake of my mind’s eye, and the future of television.

Ewwww.

Tags: women

There are other cool upsides, as well. Noise pollution would almost disappear. No more “VROOOM!” right by your ears. Also, no more need to warm an engine. You go out, you put your key in (to turn it on: also, NO IGNITION!), and press the pedal. Since it doesn’t have an operating temperature to reach, there’s no fear of premature wear – press the pedal and go.

And did I mention no more ignition? Yes, yes I did. May not sound like much, but think about how cool that really is. Right now, you rely on a battery to start a gasoline/mechanical motor, that then needs time to properly warm up in order to get you somewhere. Now, however, you would just hop in & go. The battery is the motor, and it’s not an old rusty one, either: It’s the latest technology, Lithium-Ion. No more Coke & toothbrush, y’all.

Everyone keeps talking about the plugin hybrid. But seriously, if we could get the stations going, get the power sources mostly standardized*, then yeah, you could plug it in overnight and not worry, but you could also stop along the way and change it for a fresh one when yours is out of juice. Which is way more convenient, and even if they abandoned home charging (or relegated it to 220v or something so it was less prevalent), everyone could still be properly serviced.

And has anyone bothered to think what this would do to our ties to Oil? Seriously? Buh-bye, Saudi Arabia: hope you like your desert, cuz that’s all you gonna have no mo’, fools! America would finally be free (FREE!) of the tyranny of big oil and OPEC. A truly free nation. Finally.

Go electric, huh?


*Note that there would need to be different classes. A battery powering a commuter car isn’t going to power a pickup truck for long, I don’t think nor is either of those going to work well for a Big Rig. Also, things like ATV’s and motorcycles would need a small source for the couple hundred pounds they are. This could be gotten around to some extent by running sort of a parallel system with the smaller batteries, wherein the big rig uses the same ones, but just more of them. However, that would really limit the convenience of fast changeouts if you had to change 4 or 5 for a regular car, and 9 or 10 for a truck, etc.

Tags: earth conditions, Vehicles

Last night I watched a PBS special having something to do with how scientists are trying to get the automobile to be more efficient. Typical gasoline engines are at most about 30% efficient, you see. That’s right, of the 100% of the energy you put in, 65-70% of that is lost in the form of heat, leaving only about 30% of that to push you forward (or backwards).

One of the talking points was Tesla Motors. You heard of them? They’ve got this all-electric roadster that does 0-60 in 3.9 seconds. That’s pretty fast. And there’s lots of other cool upsides to it as well. Since it’s an electric motor, there’s full-torque immediately. No matter where you are speed-wise. Imagine that: No hesitation. Ever. And did I mention the lack of pollution? Or how about the lack of motor oil, air filters, timing belts, camshafts... and so on.

Downside is though, that it only gets about 250 miles per charge. And it takes 3.5 hours to charge it. And in thinking about this, it seems to be the one true problem electric vehicles have to overcome to become mainstream: the convenience factor. Because yeah gas sucks, but even if you could go only the same 250 miles on a tank, you could stop about anywhere and fill ‘er up. Takes 5 minutes, gets you another 250 miles, you know? But with the electric car, you go those 250 miles, then you have to rent a hotel room that lets you plug into the wall, then wait 3.5 hours… As you see, it’s not terribly convenient. I do however, have a solution.

Tesla, guys, give me a call. We have to talk. The answer to your problems is to standardize the power source. That’s what the auto industry did. Fuel is fuel is fuel, you get me? I can fill up in Kansas or California, and the car runs. 87 octane, baby. Well you gotta get with that program. What needs to happen is that you need to standardize the batteries/fuel cells into different groups or sizes. Then you make them replaceable. Then you turn gas stations into Charging Stations, or more appropriately, Battery Changing Stations. Now what happens, is the electric cars go into the station, their batteries are tested to see how low they are, the customer is charged for the costs to recharge it from its current state to full, and – now here’s the genius – instead of having the battery charged, it’s exchanged for a full one. And the station keeps all the uncharged/discharged batteries and charges them to full capacity for other customers.

Is this making sense? You’re making the electric car as convenient as the gas car. All the benefits, none of the hassle that currently exists. Seriously guys, I want to see this implemented.

And, of course, I want a cut. It’s a Great Idea®, dammit, and seriously? I should get a cut.

EDIT:
Apparently, I’ve been beaten to the punch. Still a good idea though, guys. And hey, here’s another one: Solar roof panels. Imagine that: a 4x4 vehicle out in the country, never needs to fill up. Runs out of juice/gas/power, it just sits and charges for a minute. How cool?

Way cool.

Tags: Vehicles, earth conditions

The new additions to our family, being the young pups they are, need time and attention. Those 2-½ hours I’m at Jujutsu practice 2-3 times a week, well that’s their training time! That’s their play time. That’s the time they need to form good, healthy bonds. And since I want to leave them to their own devices as little as possible, that’s also more than likely (what with The Girl’s work schedule) 2-½ hours of time they have unattended to destroy more stuff.

I plan to go back, once they’re more acclimated to their new surroundings, and once they are trustworthy enough to leave at home for two additional hours alone. But right now, and for probably the next 6-8 months, that’s simply not the case.



Work is (hopefully) going well
The transition to a new store has been 10 days in the making now. It’s been kinda weird because although everything’s the same, everything is also slightly different. And for the first few days/nights, I was just trying to get my bearings. Which was difficult, because I’d be trying to think through my mental task list, and that list would resemble more of the store I came from than the store I as at, and then I’d get some wires crossed and really just end up a little off track, honestly.

But that’s calming down now. I’m getting into a slight groove, and now when I close I’m able to get us out of there quicker than the employees are ready for. I’m feeling good enough about it & getting done fast enough, that I’m prepping the morning paperwork before I leave at night. I get ready to walk the floor sooner than everyone’s prepared (through years of training) to be ready for.

Hopefully, it’s because I’m getting that good, not because I’m wholly missing some important piece. Hopefully.



Vacation begins in 3, 2, 1…
I’m so giddy I could almost fall asleep. No really, this is a good thing. I could use the rest. I think I may have mentioned it, but just in case: were you aware this is my first real vacation in like 7 years? I can’t wait.

Or I can wait about 3 days. Whatever.

Tags: Animals, New Family Members

The only real problem with them trying to sell this, is that it’s basically just a list I could make in Pages or even, if I absolutely had to use it, MS Word. Seriously? You really think that I want to buy them for $107.99 for a pack of 100? Yeah. Sorry. How about I make it myself and stick it to the fridge like I’m a good lil’ school boy instead. Nice try at a business model though. Srsly.

Peace.

Tags: Animals

They are also – and I may have mentioned this – Labradors. Which of course means that things simply must be chewed. And of course, where there’s food, there’s paws in close tow. For instance, yesterday I made 3 – count them, 3! – bags of trail mix to take with me to work as a snack. I wasn’t that into the stuff, but the first two managed to be found and subsequently devoured. How the hell they smelled trail mix through a sealed baggie & inside a laptop bag is something only The Creator can know. It’s definitely a Lab Talent. They seem to have a sense for where food is, even when technically it’s supposed to be safe.



The Truck
On Thursday night the Tundra’s battery died. It was the original one, so I guess 6 years is pretty damn good. Anyway, she needed a jump which was handled by AAA after they tested the battery. No problems, right? Wrong.

On Friday morning we called to have AAA come out to replace the battery. The wrong one was attempted, then they couldn’t get the “right” one in I guess (I was at work), so they said “here, this one will work.” And it did! For the first attempt.

Now however, as soon as it turns over and starts, it just dies. Idles down to nothing and dies. So we’re a one-car family now, but with two working adults. Fantastic.



Speaking of Work
So yeah, come Saturday, I started with a different store after being transferred. Cool, huh? Well, it does have its ups to go with its downs. The store is new and clean, and it’s organized very well. I also think I’ll get along nicely with the store manager – I like his outlook on things, it seems to tend to gravitate towards how I would look at a given situation.

But things are new & different all over again. Learning new systems, you know? And if you know me – which I think you do – then you know that I simply hate not knowing any particular thing.

And did I mention the drive? Sweet. Er, uh, not sweet.



But mostly the New Dogs
We’ve both (The Girl & me) have been quite tired this last week. Today marks only our first whole week with the laddies! And again, while they’re sweet and cute & very smart already, they’re also going to need some time. And this has meant sleeping with one eye open.

Actually they’re pretty good come sleepy time. It’s really about stressing “what’s going to be munched up when I get home?” But still, also some of the “sleeping with one eye open” thing too. Plus I’m on a 9-day workweek stretch, going from open-to-close-to-open and whatnot, which makes random bob a very tired guy.

I need to get some time alone with them, but I haven’t quite figured out how. I need to get some commands ingrained in them and be absolutely sure they understand. And I also need to manage to be around when they try to do bad things. They need correction. Maybe not much, but they need it. They need to know only a handful of things, really, but they need to know them well. They need to know: (a) you don’t jump up onto things. The couch, the counter, things that are above the floor are above it for a reason, that reason being that it’s not for you; (b) you do not chew things up that are not specifically given to you. Yeah, it may very well be edible, it may even not be edible but feel oh-so-good in your mouth. However, unless it’s given to you to chew on, it’s not meant to be in your mouth. Period. This includes but is not limited to furniture, laptops, remotes, wires, trash, fences, trash cans, footwear, other dogs, Blu-Ray Discs (you can chew DVD’s they suck anyway :-D ), Television sets, radios, iPods, pillow cases, grocery bags, food, coal (think outdoor barbeque), carpet, rugs, or containers of any nature. And also (d), I expect there to be no question as to where the poop & pee goes. It goes in that spot outside by the tree or whatever on the grass. That’s it. Nowhere else. Not in the house, not in the garage, not on the sidewalk. It goes outside on the grass.

It’s all about being able to trust that they’re not busy destroying the place while we’re away. Because really, that stuff takes time away. Time away from taking them out fun places, time away from feeding them nice treats, and the rest. If I have to come home and clean the something-or-other for 30 minutes, well then, that’s 30 minutes less of playtime. And it might mean even less than that. Because if I was going to go out for 45 minutes, but now I’ve spent 30 cleaning… well maybe 15 minutes ain’t worth the effort, you know?

But they’re good thus far, a week in. They don’t need leashes already. They know their names and they come when called which is good. And they don’t run, despite the fact that I found them roaming the streets.

We’re going to have fun. I just need them to get The Rules down, is all. And they’ve got some time. They’re doing alright.

Peace.

Tags: Animals, New Family Members

Despite my slightly tepid outlook for the film, it turned out to be quite good. I think that maybe some of the poorer reviews centered around what people thought the movie was supposed to be. Namely, a comedy. It’s not a comedy. People see Steve Carell’s name and assume it’s going to be a comedy. It’s not a comedy. It’s a cute romance with some comedic elements. And I think if you can grasp that and accept it for what it is, instead of grading it poorly because there’s not enough jokes, then you can really get more enjoyment out of the film.

I liked it. I liked it quite a bit, actually. Maybe it was because I could relate to some degree with the main character. What’s it like to be true, but overlooked? What’s it like to be special in your own regard but to be far overshadowed when you’re in the mix? How’s it feel to suck at showing off what you’re good at? I mean, this guy is a great guy. But he fails in this group atmosphere he’s in. He’s a one-on-one guy, but the problem is, if you can’t get yourself noticed, it’s a hard sell in the game of love.

The movie has its faults. The ending is too happy. Suddenly everyone that hated him for some of his actions is now rooting him on? Everything falls into place? Kismet? Meant to be, right? Look, “real life” is not that easy. I would rather have had him have to work for his redemptions a little bit, rather than having them handed over. Yeah I think that the outcome was good, but the steps were a bit small for the character, is all. But despite some flaws in character & development, overall it’s a good watch if you can stand the low-level romance. If you’re a girl, you’ll probably dig the movie. If you’re a guy but you’re not afraid to watch a movie without Sly or Ahnold, you can enjoy this movie.
So go and enjoy this movie. Random bob gives it a B+

Peace.

Oh really? That many of you? Huh. OK, I guess I’ll shut up now.



Vacation Day update
I spoke with my current store manager about the vacation days I had planned to see what I needed to do about those dates. Lucky me, she said she had conferred with my soon-to-be store manager, and they transferred over my vacation dates already.

Whew! Now I don’t have to try and reschedule a week and a half of doing nothing! Might have been a true bind right there, had I been required to attempt it.



Good Aggravation America
I am swearing off of the morning “news” stuff. I mean, I’ve never really been a big fan or anything mind you, but yeah I tune in occasionally so that I can catch the weather if nothing else, and keep up with current events. But I tire so easily of the small focus and over-dramatics; I just don’t think I can do it any longer and have hair, too.

Today’s stories were about some recent high-school grads SCUBA-diving in Cancun, when their boat – that was some 100 yards off shore – started to sink, and they had to swim for their lives! OK yeah it sucks, but let’s put this in perspective: You’re 100 yards from shore. In warm, blue waters. In Cancun. It’s not like you’re being thrown of Black Beard’s ship in the middle of the Atlantic, right? Sucky the small craft sunk, but get over it. But MAN! To hear these morning-whores tell it, it was a tragic accident waiting to happen that nearly took the lives of 5,000 civilians. And you know what else? All the people that were on the ship – on a SCUBA-diving trip – were there against there will, held by terrorists, and couldn’t swim. Most of them were paraplegics, half of them were bound & gagged, and it might have been an attempt to free Al Queda suspects in Guantanamo.

The other story was one of a Tornado ripping through the Boy Scout Camp in some Mid-Eastern State. 4 died. This is sad, but they spent some 30 minutes harping on it, as if there weren’t 30 other tornadoes that same day (there were), that killed more people in other places (they did). But oh MAN! BOY SCOUTS! IN TROUBLE! MUST COVER WITH SUPER-SAD FACE! Yeah it’s sad, but so is lots of other things that happened, too. Cover it and move on, you know?

But they can’t. They’re morning-whores, and they can only focus on simple issues with clearly-defined good guys and clearly-defined bad guys, and then repeat the issue verbatim over and over for at least 1-½ hours. In case we didn’t get how sad it was, and how obviously-caring they truly, truly are.

Yeah I’m through with that. I’ll stick with reading my news from actual news sources, thanks.

Peace.

Tags: hate

You know, Us Weekly and People Magazine. Those pitiful excuses for reading. I’m not asking a rhetorical question, I haven’t a clue. I stare at them on break @ work sometimes, and I can’t for the life of me figure out why the hell people are so concerned with the lives of others. Enough so to actually pay $5 a week to read about it. You know, as if they’re close family or something.

F*ck that. Read my blog, people. Much more entertaining, and hey – I might be a celebrity. Someday.



Other developments on the soon-to-be store transfer
I had put in for vacation in late July. Now what? Man, I hope they don’t revoke my dates or something. Because I have absolutely nothing planned for those dates and I’d hate to have to reschedule all of that. Dammit.

But seriously, though. I want my days off. I put in for them like two months ago. I am really looking forward to working out, sleeping, and hiking, and sleeping some more, and that’s about it. No work, no shaving, no bathing… OK bathing occasionally, but we’re talking every-other-day at the most here, alright? Seriously. I smell like roses naturally anyhow.



Other-other developments on the soon-to-be-store transfer
I just might be able to justify a motorcycle again! How cool would that be? Oh…. My. You have no idea the trouble I’d get into on a sportbike (is there any other kind of motorcycle to have, really?) on the 101. Oh… my… god. This could be awesome.

So long as I could find one for like $1,000. More than that and the gas savings don’t justify the purchase price over the next 6 months. And once I move back to an in-town store again, with the minimal driving I do to get to work anyhow it would take probably 6 years to make the purchase price worth it.

Don’t tell The Girl this, however. Thoughs she thought it was hot when she met me, she’d rather I didn’t now. Go Figure. Anyway. Me + sportbike = AWESOME. Trust me, I know; been there, done that. I’ve crashed more GSX-R 1000’s than you’ve ever ridden more than likely. Trust me, I know; been there, done that.

Peace.

Tags: Vehicles

A few days ago I mentioned that I was going to be changing my driving habits a little bit. Well today @ work, I learned that I will get to feel the full effect of this come July 8th. You see, currently I live a whopping 1-½ miles from work. Come July 8th – when I transfer stores – I will be about 17 miles from door-to-door. Yikes. Let’s put that in perspective:

Say I average 10 mi/gal right now. Let’s round up and say the trip is currently 2 miles (I like easy math!). OK, so that’s 5 trips on a gallon. So if gas is $4/gal, that means that every 5 days back & forth to work, it costs me $8 in gas. Not bad!

OK so I get better gas mileage going the 17 miles down the freeway. Now let’s say that driving the new route, I’ll average 17mi/gal. WOW. OK so now we’re looking at $8 a day for gas. Holy f*ck, that’s a 500% increase in gas expenses, people. Now these numbers aren’t quite exact. For instance, I’ll probably average between 20-25 miles a gallon in reality, but up here, whereas the rest of the US is averaging $4/gallon, I haven’t seen it less than $4.60/gallon. Yes, it’s that much more than what you’re paying (unless of course you’re reading this from Europe, in which case… I feel your pain).

This is going to put a dent in my pocketbook for the next 6 months or so before I rotate back to town. Sh!t I’d say we should move if it weren’t for the fact that in 6 months I’ll probably be right back in here… it’s hard as hell finding a place for the pups too, so since we have a place, we’ll probably keep that place, you know? It’s secure at least. What if we move and the landlords there suck? What if in 6 months we can’t find another place in town? Yeah, I think we’ll have to stick it out. Especially since if we move, that just means The Girl would be driving back into town for work the same distance.



Apple WWDC 2008 Notes of Interest
Apple today did a few interesting things: One, they introduced the next-generation iPhone, which will have massive price cuts associated with it (at&t is subsidizing apparently). Sorta makes the iPod Touch look… well, overpriced. I hope they drop that a few pennies. Maybe I’d get one if they did. I’m in the market for a new iPod anyway, sh!t. C’mon, Apple!

They also announced that they will be distributing a new version of Leopard next year, dubbed “Snow Leopard.” The similarities in name are signal that there are no major feature changes between the two. No, Snow Leopard is supposed to be a stability release more than anything, and all signs point to them dropping support for PPC chips with this release as well.

I’m looking forward to it. We could use a stability release. I’m cool with that.



Funny moment of the day
It was beautiful day when I left for work this morning, and indeed stayed that way pretty much all day, until about an hour before I got off of work. I got outside, and it was misting a bit, and really it was kind of a cool atmosphere outside; the mist was coming in sideways and it almost looked like a heavy fog but you could see far. It looked like the ground was steaming, and though it was coming off sideways, there wasn’t really a breeze that I could feel. I can’t really explain it.

Anyway, when I got home, I opened the back gate and saw a bucket and sponge. Which means… The Girl washed her truck today.

That is… just too damn funny. HA HA!

Peace.

Tags: Apple, women

Most people view their email from a website. They log on to yahoo or maybe hotmail if they're kinda retarded or if they’re more informed, maybe gmail, and then view from their web browser. But there’s a better way. If you have an email client, which you probably do – Outlook on Windows (why are you on Windows, though?), or Mail on the Mac – and your email provider has POP or IMAP access as an option, why not just set up the mail client to log in to your account for you? This way, you save the steps of having to navigate to a website, log in, then find your inboxes or whatnot. Now, you simply start your client up, and it’s all there! Easy as pie. What’s more, you don’t’ have to ever actually quit your mail client; leave it running, and periodically it will check for new mail for you and inform you of its arrival, which is nice.

This is especially useful if you have more than one email address you access. For instance, I have at least seven email addresses I access daily, each serving a different function. I have one that serves this site, one that only friends and family know of, one that’s a throw-away from web forms, one that is for “work” and… well you get it. Anyway, I start up Mail, and it takes care of getting all my emails for me, every 15 or so minutes.

There’s a catch, though. You see, there’s two different ways that you can have your mail accessed, and the two behave quite differently. They each have benefits & drawbacks, so if you have the choice it might come down to being informed. How are they different?


POST OFFICE PROTOCOL (POP)
POP works essentially by downloading your email to your machine. Your email client logs in, queries the email server, and downloads your email for viewing. This means that you will have a local copy of each and every email on your machine.


INTERNET MESSAGE ACCESS PROTOCOL (IMAP)
IMAP is different. With IMAP enabled, when you start your client, it again queries the server, but this time instead of downloading the message from the server, it is essentially just acting as a window to the messages. When you view an IMAP email, you’re peering through a window into the email server, where the email really is.


PROS AND CONS
The upside of the IMAP setup is that you are not wasting disk space on your machine with emails. So depending on how many emails you have, this could save a lot of disk space. Another positive is that should your computer crash or otherwise be incapacitated, your emails are still safe on the email server. And also, you have the ability to keep your emails synced across machines. The downside is that since you're just viewing the emails, if you are away from the internet you will be unable to download any attachments or sometimes, even view old messages. The other less-likely downside – though it did happen at least once recently that I’m aware of – is that if the email server crashes & burns, you could potentially lose all of your email data with it.

POP has almost equal and opposite pros and cons. POP means storing your emails locally on your machine, but that means that you are able to access them at all times, regardless of whether or not you have an internet connection. Also, though you have the chance of losing all your emails if your hard drive goes kaput, if you are backing up regularly – like you should be – you’re insulated from this as well. And you never have to worry about those who serve your email losing it themselves!

This comes to a head for me because recently, one of the main channels I use for email access – google’s gmail – added in the option of doing either POP or IMAP; usually you get one or the other.

Anyway, I have been using their email access via POP. I prefer POP, because the way I see it, my emails are MY emails, I don’t want to “rent” them from an email provider. Yes it means storing my emails locally, but in this age the space they take up is so miniscule as to be rather unimportant, archives and all. And with gmail’s almost-limitless server space, you can actually get the benefits of the IMAP experience – having your email on the server. If you initiate a POP email account and specify that you want the email server to keep a copy of all emails on the server, they will be there regardless of whether local catastrophe hits your machine.

Anyway, long story short I prefer POP. All of the arguments I see in favor of IMAP usually revolve around the data security & synchronized machines arguments; but if you don’t delete the messages from the server if you do POP, then you can actually achieve almost the same results, but with the added benefits of being able to “own” your messages, and/or access already-downloaded content whenever you want, internet access or no.

I really don’t see the benefit of IMAP, outside of businesses being able to control/regulate/read through all the emails of their employees at any time in a local manner. If that doesn’t pertain to you, then really it’s more a question of whether you’d rather rent, or own?

I prefer ownership.

Peace.

So a few nights ago we went to the symphony. They did Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake (remember I had said that it was Mozart; I was wrong – that’s next month). It was very pretty.

I have lots of classical music in my collection. But nothing can really compare to the depth, the power of the live orchestra. It’s magical. The music is alive, you feel it and it’s a wonderful experience, it really is. Tonight was the first that I have ever been to see an orchestra live. I liked it. I liked it a lot. I – I think we may make this “Our Thing,” as it were. It’s just too bad that they’re off the charts after next month. I think the “season” opens up again in October. Nice. Hopefully in time for my birthday. Buy me a present, btw.



Dairy farming: Organic vs “Conventional”
I was reading some “Did You Know” facts about a local dairy co-op while on lunch @ work the other day. They were saying that 19 of their members were “conventional” dairy farmers and 24 were Organic. And it got me thinking. It’s a simple question, and it’s a simple answer.

What is “Conventional?” And what is “Organic?” Conventional is by definition what is done ‘normally.’ Organic is taken to mean that the product is raised/groomed/created without the use of synthetic chemicals. Up until sometime around the middle of the last century, there were not many synthetic chemicals to bother mentioning. And it seemed to me, isn’t ‘Organic’ actually ‘Conventional?’

I mean, that’s the way it’s typically done, in nature for sure, and also around most of the globe and throughout history. Conventional is Organic. At least it should be. I am not sure why it’s perverted now, though.

They should rename ‘Conventional’ to more accurately describe what it is: “Hormone- & Unnatural Antibiotic-infested farming.” Or they could just shorten it to “Unnatural Farming.” I’d be OK with that too.

Seriously though, think about that next time you hear the word ‘Conventional.’ It sounds very low-key, very tame, something that you could take for granted. But really think about what it’s being applied to. It seems to me that just like “No Child Left Behind” was a victory of title over substance, they are using language to quell any fears that what they’re really doing might arouse. No one wants to buy milk that comes from “Hormone- & Unnatural Antibiotic-infested farming,” or even “Unnatural Farming.” But hey, Milk from “Conventional” farming methods? That doesn’t sound so bad!

Yeah. I’m all-organic, baby. And proud. And healthy. Thanks, I’ll pass on the “Conventional.”

Peace.

Tags: earth conditions

Yeah it’s true, random bob & The Girl are gettin’ cultured and sh!t! Ain’t that the damnedest!

We’ve actually been planning it awhile now. Well not really. Kinda. Kinda-sorta. Anyway. See what it was is that we love the idea of going to these types of concerts (Mozart’s on tap tonight). We’ve never actually been though. But there’s a really nice theatre in town and we wanted to make time for it at some point, so we put into our calendar some events they had in their calendar. Just so happens that last week it became apparent that this event and our schedules collided; we had the time & the opportunity, so we pulled the trigger and bought us some tickets.

Mozart better be damn good after all this trouble! Ha. Hey I know he’s good it was just a joke, c’mon. I have tons of Mozart in my iTunes library. Yeah. Culture, see?



Retraining myself
Nothing special or important. I’ve been a heavy mouse user even since the day I opted for laptop over desktop. Today I decided that it’s really not that more convenient. I’m trying to retrain myself to use the trackpad instead.

So far it’s going OK. Not great, just OK. And I’m not sure how much of that is due to the fact that in the back of my mind, I know the mouse is only a hand’s grab away.



Random bob gets published online (somewhere else)
I recently had an issue with a certain credit card company. Armed Forces Bank, this one’s for you!

You see, I started my credit history with them. But they make it so difficult to get a better limit or rate that I just never bothered, I mean hell I have like 10 credit cards, so what’s the point? I just stopped using theirs for the most part, breaking it out occasionally so that it would still be valid and have a history. Well I left a small credit balance on there for some months without thinking much of it. Then I used the card after a long hiatus. Well come to find out what I owed didn’t match my books! Turns out they had “written off” my credit balance.

So basically, I left them in charge of a few cents of mine, and then they stole it from me. This didn’t seem right, and when I called they essentially said they would not help me unless I paid $3 a month for all the months backwards of the last 3 for research costs. Nice. Well they stole my money, then tried to get me to pay more money to have them tell me they stole my money, and I cancelled. And then sent a line to The Consumerist. You may have heard of them before, I have a link on the side of the page there and I think most everyone ought to read it daily.

Well, wouldn’t you know it? They eventually ran with my story. Turns out AFB isn’t the only ones doing it, as another gent got the same treatment from Wachovia.

So uh, yeah. Check your statements closely. Apparently rolling in money won’t stop your banks from stealing your pocket-change.

Peace.

Last night I was told as I took shift that we could probably expect a visit from our Corporate Internal Theft/ Loss Prevention division. Well this makes the night a little harder than usual, because now we have to dot all our I’s and cross all our T’s, but then we also have to go and initial that we did that & get verification that we did indeed dot & cross and initial those I’s and T’s.

And it struck me: the business model is flawed. We don’t do on a daily basis what the Loss Prevention department would have us do. We can’t. If we followed all those directives, we’d not get anything done that is needed to get done to move product out and get the store shoppable. We just can’t, it takes too much time to be so tight-fisted on every front. Obviously the simple answer to all of that is “schedule more people,” and I agree, except that we’re also on hour budgets, so we can’t. If we schedule more people, we go over-budget on man-hours, and we get raked over the coals for that. And that’s when I realized that there’s this disconnect between the people designing the directives and the ones carrying them out. They’re not carried out is the trick, because it’s simply not possible to complete the overall mission and actually follow all the conflicting directions. No one ever tells the higher-ups how it really works, because they don’t want to be hung out to dry. Because honestly, if one store steps out when no others complain? Then it seems they’re mismanaged, because no one else complained, so they get reprimanded, which stands as a good testament to the other stores as to why they shouldn’t mention it.

So the Loss Prevention Department works to restrict sales and efficiency. And the Sales and Marketing department works to grow sales and efficiency. They collide. Fun ensues.



Pomp & Circumstance
I also thought, however, that it might be a necessity. As in, perhaps they do indeed know that their directives step all over one another. In a perfect world, maybe it would all be possible to do. However, I thought that perhaps the district personnel know that it’s an utter impossibility to toe the line and still meet sales objectives. Perhaps they know it’s all a show when they’re in town….

What I was thinking was that, even though we can’t follow the rules as strictly as they’re set, maybe it’s like aiming for the moon. Sure you’ll never get it, but by setting the goal at that level, you are more likely to stay in a “middle ground” that is acceptable. I mean, I thought to myself, why don’t they relax the rules and let us do our jobs? But then I thought, if they did relax the rules, probably a great many stores would not be as close to the standard as they now are; lowering the standards typically lowers performance, even if you’re simply lowering the standard to the current, sustainable level of performance. See “No Child Left Behind” for the point.

Maybe? Maybe that’s what it is? Maybe it is all show & go… They show up, we do the little dance so they know how important they are, and then they go…. And we get back to doing our jobs.

I think that may be it.

So last night I was closing @ work. But I wasn’t really closing, I was supposed to be “training” on the computer. But it turned into a busy night, and I got pulled/volunteered to help the real manager on duty to get everything caught up, so that we’d all get out on time or at least close to it.

Somewhere along the course of the night, it came up in conversation that some of the closing requirements seem sort of redundant and wasteful (of time at least), such as counting all the debit/credit receipts. Seems silly, because if we’re off according to what the computer has tallied, we then go into the computer and print the missing receipts… so it would seem rather redundant to make sure we have paper copies, when if the paper copies are off, we just print the transaction out of the history of the machine. Where it’s already stored. So uh, couldn’t we just not worry about the paper copy?

Anyway, I mentioned something along the lines of “once I’m the store manager…” at which point the other manager asked if I’d fire her if I was the store manager. Uhhh……

How do you answer this when the honest answer is “Maybe”?

Here’s how: you stutter, say something along the lines of “I’m not qualified to make that sort of assessment now,” and wait – no, hope – for some sort of timely interruption. That’s how. How am I supposed to know?



Decór decisions
The place The Girl works at is a little, well, strangely decorated to say the least. It’s not modern, it’s not old-fashioned, it’s a mishmash of ideas that don’t really flow so well. I’m sitting at the place right now, looking around, wanting to smack a certain someone.

That certain someone is a local artist whose work is locally acclaimed. He’s like a god around these parts. And most definitely, the bastard is talented. I have seen some work from him that is very very good. But his taste… his taste is that of Picasso at his Cubist best.

F*ck Cubism. I’m sorry, it’s not good art. Whenever I look at it, I want to pull it off the wall and wipe a certain nether-region with it, then flush. It’s a crock. It’s not art. It’s bullsh!t. It’s Pablo Picasso selling his 3 year-old son’s work to someone for lots of money, and laughing. And more people buying crap like that thinking it’s “high art,” and him laughing at them. I can’t help but think that it’s all one big joke, and Pablo just laughed and laughed, sort of like the guy who faked the Sasquatch footprint, let it build into a huge thing, and never told anyone; just laughed and laughed at everyone’s expense over their own naiveté.

Yes, that’s what it is. I am convinced. Pablo is laughing at all of you who think cubism is art.

Ha- freaking ha. Losers.

Tags: hate

And they felt good. All went smoothly, and I actually moved more weight than I figured I would; pretty much 100% of what I normally would do. Maybe 95%. Definitely at least 90-95%. Definitely.



Lookin’ Good, too
Not, like, compared to others or anything, but after just one workout following a near 2-week hiatus, it’s a miraculous change. I have a chest again. A small chest, but a chest nonetheless. Sweet.



Feeling good about work, too
I don’t want to jinx myself, which I’m prone to do (read here, then here, and here), but I’m feeling good about myself at work. I’m not about to rewrite the company or anything yet, but I feel like I’ve got the hang of what needs to be done and how to accomplish it. And I notice that even though I’m the newest management hire, when I am closing shop, I am tiypically 100% on, out on on time, and neater than the others (at my level, anyhow; my superior manager is still better than I by quite the margin). Not to knock the others, they excel at certain things beyond what I am currently capable of, but I’m just saying…

But yeah, uh, no jinxing hopefully. It’s just that I feel like I can work there and succeed. I just need more time to learn.



Oh. My. Goodness.
On the agenda for tonight? A day I have off? Well besides another workout (legs this time), we’re going to sit down and watch No Country for Old Men. I have no idea how this happened, mind you. I put it on our Netflix queue, but it was listed as “Long Wait.” Yet for whatever reason, it’s the next movie we got.

Which is really cool, because I wasn’t in a Rocky Balboa kind of mood. Which was the next movie that actually had an “available” status. Next week though, it's me & you Balboa.

Peace.

Tags: Gym

One thing that seems to stick out at me in the business world is how they are oh-so-willing to create a straw man of any sort to blame for slumping sales. Sales are slow? Must mean that we’re not building good displays! Or they attribute characteristics to people that may or may not exist, but state these as fact and look to exploit them. We need signs that show how much they’re saving off of MSRP, cuz people love to save!

Yes, people love to save, but they love to save real money, not fake money. I don’t doubt that some people are going to look at a sign saying that this bag of cookies has $5 written on it but wow, we’re saving you so much money because we’re only selling it for $3! Well yeah maybe a few poor schlocks are going to fall for that, but mostly? Well, the people with the money, the people you should be chasing for sales, are smart enough to say “yeah but those cookies are only worth $2; they’re crappy.”

The issue is that these things used to work. Advertising is fairly new, the way we do it. When these tactics first started to appear in the 50’s and 60’s, they worked well, and they worked well through the 80’s. But something happened in the 90’s that the business world is still trying to ignore; it’s the elephant in the room, and they keep falling back onto old habits instead of dealing with the reality of today:

The reality is that I am the consumer now. And I’ve seen this mess of advertising, and I don’t buy the hype. Since all I’ve ever known is to see products completely over-hyped at every turn, I’ve tuned that out. I’m oblivious to it. Not only that, but more typically, I am turned off by it. I have swam in the sea of advertising-speak since my birth. I am numb to it, and quite frankly, tired of it. I don’t want to hear marketing-talk, I want to hear about the product, honestly, and what it can do for me. When I read the box, I want to know where it came from, who built it, and what I’m paying for. Made in China? Hey that’s not an automatic disqualifier, guys. I might still buy your product. But at what cost is the question…

There’s a matter of psychology at work to know your business and your customers and be a success. But you have to learn about your customers, not make blanket statements about them. And if you want to be more than head-above-water, the best way to create success is to see not just where your customers are now, but where they’re going, and more importantly, why. It’s not the signs guys, it’s the value system behind it.



Home Late, honey? Surprise!
Aw, isn’t The Girl sweet? I had to stay late at work last night (floor guys came by to wax/polish), and when I got home, she was in bed asleep. But on the counter… was carrot cake! Hey, those of you who know me know that I’m a fool for a good carrot cake. And hers in the best, because she makes it from scratch – even the frosting! – and it’s all organic.

Strange thing is, I love carrot cake, I love the frosting, but I can’t stand cream cheese. Weird, huh?

Oh well. Cake was still excellent. But again... Don't tell her any of this. It'll just go to her head. :-)

Tags: women

Today I got called into the office by another manager from the Floor where I was doing a reset on some merchandise (moving, adding new, all-in-all “resetting” the products).

I asked the problem and was told that the reset I had started wasn’t supposed to be started until another 3 weeks out or so. I said “BS,” as the paperwork called for it to be done on 2/29, so we’re right on schedule. Well yeah, but we just got an email to wait because they’re changing the shelf units and other stuff regarding it, I was told. My response?

Oh f*cking well! What am I supposed to do? Undo all the work we’re already got going? Put it back?

Luckily for us both, it was just a joke. A bad, bad joke, but a joke nonetheless.



Sick? Get over it…!
So I finally came down with whatever The Girl had a few days ago, as you probably know. She was ill and out of it for about a week, so I wasn’t looking forward to having that bug get me, whatever it was – think it was the flu.

Well, I felt like poop the day after I knew I was sick, but after that? Well, I’m on my way to recovery already, methinks. My throat’s still a lil’ sore, but I don’t feel like my brain’s disconnected from my body anymore, which is good, and my strength’s returning, which is awesome. Still not 100%, but instead of feeling like 40%, I gauge I’m around 75-80%. Which is good.

So to what do I contribute such a fast turnaround? Working out and a nice, healthy, organic diet. Yup. I mean, what the heck else could it be? Before working out, I was sick a lot. Started working out, stopped getting sick. Started eating organic, now apparently when I do get sick, it only lasts a day or so.

So workout, take care of your body, eat healthy, and I’ll see you around or something. Cuz you won’t be in bed sick, is what I’m saying. Yeah.

Peace.

Waiting for Spring to have, uh, sprung. Fall went quick, Summer went quicker, but Winter will not go away. What the Hell.

I keep going to the beach hoping I can run around without a shirt on and get a tan. But mostly it’s just chilly. Some days I have gotten away with it, but 90% of the time I take a jacket with me and cling to it like crazy to Britney.

Then I have to remind myself that yes, indeed it’s only February. I don’t know why I’d expect to be livin’ it up in the sun in the dead of Winter.

Silly random bob! This ain’t So Cal! Remember, that’s why we’re here now!



Something I am contemplating
Notes on God. I don’t know why, but I spend a lot of time thinking about God. You may find this strange if you know me, as you know I’m agnostic, but there’s more to it than that; I believe in God, just not the book version. I don’t subscribe to religion, I tend to think it’s a pox on our people, perverted more often than not to help a few subvert a many.

But I do believe in God. And when I’m alone, doing the dishes, looking out the windows, my mind wanders, and I think of God. What do I think God is? I have lots of ideas at different times. Or rather, I have the same idea, but come up with new ways to frame it with words. And I think I should start a running log, sort of a “conversations with myself – about God” kind of journal, just tracking my ideas as they hit me. I mean, my laptop’s never far from me anyway, so it’s not like it’d be hard to do. Might have to do that. Maybe just make blog entries about it :-)



How is it you believe in god?
Well I knew it would be a strange idea for some of you to accept I do indeed believe in God. I mean, I do spend an awful lot of energy denouncing religion after all. Why do I believe in God? I believe in evolution, I don’t believe some “being” created man as he is today, I think we evolved from monkeys, who in turn evolved from amoebas.

I think that God did not create life per se, he created to drive to live. And life sprung from that. Make sense? Well maybe I can make it a little clearer:

Evolution makes complete sense, we see it day-in, day-out. But where does it start? I mean, I can grasp an amoeba eventually mutating, turning into something else, etc etc. But at the very beginning, what made a bunch of inanimate stuff decide to form an amoeba? What doesn't make sense is evolution coming into being from inanimate surroundings. Why would a grain of dirt decide that it should form DNA or something of that sort? Why subject itself to death? I mean, how does an inanimat