OK, so about that thing with Heroes being Lost for the ADD-afflicted? Yeah, nevermind. Now that they know they’ve got a fairly steady base, they’ve adopted the same glacial pace as Lost. They do it slightly differently, but that’s to say six of one, half a dozen of the other. And I’m talkin’ about a REAL dozen, not that baker’s dozen, because that would mean 6 of one, 7 of the other which is really not the effect I’m going for here.

OK, so Lost spends an episode revealing the history of ONE guest at a time. So this Wednesday (figuratively; Lost isn’t on until Feb 7th, 2007) we might see a hour devoted to the history of Jack. Now, let’s say, for fun, that there’s 6 (or half a dozen) people on the island. For us to know an hour’s history for everyone, that’s six episodes.

Now Heroes just does it ⅙th at a time for each hour episode for each for everyone, with the same 6 characters. And guess what? It still takes the same 6 episodes (or half a dozen) to get an hour’s-worth of history for each dude or dudette on the show.

Lost and Heroes make a great case for TIVO though. Whether you prefer dozens or whole numbers. Like, record a few episodes, remove commercials, and commence. I like the idea. I just need TIVO now.



Brett Favre can’t win for losing
OK, so for absolute YEARS he and the GB Packers menaced my 49ers in the playoffs, sending my team home early instead of to the super bowl. Let’s just say that I calmly grew to hate the guy. Now last night, it’s the Seahawks (played by people in this reenactment) versus this man and his GB crew. Except last night, my pool ended in a tie going into MNF, and I had picked GB over Seattle.

For some strange reason, Brett Favre (pronounced “Fucker.” Yeah I know, you’d think it would be “Fav-ra”) managed to almost single handedly lose the game. Come the 4th qurater, and wouldn’t you know it, he thinks the Seattle defenders are on his team.

So the bastard doesn’t really like to win, he just likes to frustrate me. At least now I know. Cost me $20 damn dollars, you know. I’m writing my congresswoman.



I shop Macy’s, Darling
No really, I do. Er, um, at least I did last night. See, as you may recall from this blog post, we have nothing to our names at the moment for our move up north save for a kick-ass entertainment system (so that we – well, – stay entertained). We had gone this weekend and picked up a flatware set for what we thought was a great deal at Mervyn’s for $39.99. Turns out, however, that deal was sort of sour as the silverware bends rather easily. Hey, I’m hard on spoons; I use them to scoop my ice cream, and they need to take the abuse and still look good, dammit.

Last night at Macy’s, we found that set. From Oneida, which I remember as a quality set from my childhood. Yay childhood memories, huh? Anyways, we picked it up for about double the price of Mervyn’s which was in line with the pricing @ Kohl’s and other places. But it’s a quality set and also a little bigger, weighing in at a hefty 53 pieces. Yay to pieces.

Nifty thing I liked about Macy’s? They have the sets out on display, so I could touch, hold, and attempt to bend (successfully on some sets) the silverware and such. Not so nifty, depending on your take? This means they also have their cutlery sets out so you can touch and feel them, too. Cutlery. As in, sharp, razor blade edges that anyone could grab and accidentally use as a weapon. Had thoughts about how that could go awry, but I would hate to see anything locked down, so I refrained from saying anything. Maybe I should? Nah.

Peace.

So the first rain of the season comes along, and as expected, everyone in southern california freaks the fuck out. Because, you know, we’ve never seen rain before around here, so it’s probably the apocalypse or something.

I also find out that my mother was home early today, which prompted me to ask what she was doing there instead of at work. Turns out there was no power at her office! My thoughts went to “wow, so that little tiny bit of barely noticeable rain was enough to knock the power out of your office? Wow.” She, however, says nay-nay, which is comedic for “no, stupid.” See, apparently there was this guy who crashed his truck which killed the power. So I reckon, of course, that the rain caused the power to go out because it’s a well-known fact that 90% of southern californians can’t drive in the rain. Nay-nay, I hear, that’s not the case. Rather, he was forced off the road. “OK, so did someone purposefully aim him off of the road?” Nay-nay, I hear, there was a bad accident that happened, and it forced him off the road.

So you see, um, as I was saying, that small little tiny bit of barely noticeable rain knocked the power out on her whole block.

Oh, and in a related piece of irony: They guy whose truck crashed and took out the power? Worked for the Electric Company in that city. And moonlights as a weather forecaster. OK, I made the weather forecaster bit up, but it’s still funny.



Dear God, save me from the Dumb Southerners
You all may remember this blog, where I crowned a particular woman with the dumb southerner of the year award well in advance. Well, she’s called back thrice since then to assure me that I made the right decision.

Thanks, sweetie.

OH. MY. GOD. OK, so she originally called to order parts for her boyfriend who apparently owns a car (she’s real proud). Lucky me, he decided to sell this car so he could get his double-wide (she’s even prouderer). So she calls back to let us know that she’s returning the stuff, because she doesn’t think that a Cold Air Kit for a Car will fit on the Double-Wide. Nothing special, and it didn’t even bother me, mostly because she talked to Jaxan and not me, and yes, before anyone asks, she hurt his head, too.

OK, but there’s more, right? Yes, yes there is. Last week around Wednesday, she calls me to let me know that she has sent it back. Great, honey, just fabulous. You’re so cute. But then she takes up 10 minutes of my time with what I thought would eventually lead to some important point I needed to know, only to inform me that she didn’t send it out, but her friend did that works for Fed Ex did. FINE! GEEBUS! NOW HANG UP THE PHONE!

Eventually she does. But not for too long, as she called back again today! OK, so what’s your deal now, woman!? Oh, don’t worry y’all, this one was important: she wanted to know if I could track it and see when we were getting it back. Um, let’s see here, you sent it to us, so…. No, bitch, you’re supposed to TAKE THE TRACKING # YOUR GENIUS FRIEND GAVE YOU and do that yourself! See how that works? OK, she finally gets that point, right? Right? Wrong. See, this starts another 10 minute conversation that basically boils down to “I’ll call you later to check on that return,” but a lot more dumb than that.

SHIT. I hope she’s pretty, dammit.



Some guy from some place has something that I want
This fellow I met online about 2 years ago (shut up!) recently chatted me up to let me know he was getting a new Macbook Pro. We talked and I eventually talked him in to getting the 17” version. I didn’t try to do that, just sort of told him my wish list and why.

Now the bastard went and got everything I wanted, down to the screen finish. The bastard. Twice just isn’t enough: the bastard. And he tells me it’s fast, real fast. God, I hate him.



I have never been molested
Yeah, for those of you that read the above first sentence and thought “met some guy online, huh?” you can go and DIE. Truth be told, when the new operating system of the day came out (10.4 Tiger), lots of people were having issues with a new feature of iChat: the multi-person videos. At the time, I had a machine powerful enough to host such a function, and I wanted to test it out because I, too, had been having issues.

He’s one of the people who signed up to this one particular forum to test it out. And he’s been on my buddy list ever since. So knock it off. Really. Dweebs.



Bold apparently Broken
For some reason, bold seems to be sort of finicky lately. Sometimes I get it to bold words for me, sometimes I do not. Mostly “do not” right now, really. And it shows up on my end as bold, but when it publishes to the web, not so much. So I don’t quite know yet what’s going on, I’ll need to run some more tests.

So use your judgment: if you read something here and it seems like it would be better in bold, then it was supposed to be in bold so just use your imagination.

Peace. Er, Bold.

Tags: hate, earth conditions

Wouldn’t you know it, nothing with any sort of funny spin has transpired in like weeks. Really. Nothing has been remotely funny in awhile now. Seriousness has been the word, and that word has been seriousness. Wait – oh, never mind.

But why? I have no idea, but I don’t think it was my fault, that’s for sure. I think I’ve been the victim of unfunny times. But keep comin’ back, there may be some comedy coming some time soon. I have no idea, I’m just grabbing at straws, man.



Shopping today. Not Friday, but Today
The Girl and I decided that if we’re going to be getting stuff for our trek up north, that perhaps the holiday sale season would be a good time to stock up on stuff. Because we have noooooothhhhhinnnnnng to our names. Really. Like, before today when we purchased some silverware from Mervyn’s (60% of regular price, baby!), we were probably going to be eating soup with our hands, as The Girl put it. Ho hum.

We still need some cookware to heat the soup up though, otherwise we’ll be eating cold soup out of a can with some decent looking silverware. Because, um, I may have forgot to mention, but we don’t have flatware yet, either, so no bowls or nothing to put that cold soup in.

We are also still in the market for: Cups, cooking utensils, knife sets, a Refrigerator (you have no idea how giddy we are about getting THE refrigerator we want are dreaming of), a California King bed (and to think I thought we were part of a democracy), and furniture. We have a couch. And an HDTV. And one Hutch to put it on, nothing more.

And of course, I’m still in the hunt for a new Macbook Pro :-P Hey, if you can think of something we’re missing, we’re listening, so pipe in with some good advice.



Wish me Luck
So this week @ work is the $5 dollar NFL pool. Indy is in control as I write, though they’re starting to “give up” in the 4th quarter, which really tends to PISS ME OFF about them. Seriously, guys, the game is 4 quarters long, you gotta play ALL FOUR QUARTERS, huh? But I also picked Chicago to lose, which turns out was a good pick ;-).

Now, I tend to always forget to make a copy of the damn pick sheet, so I’ll have to check it out tomorrow when I get to work, but needless to say I want to win, and I may need your help to get there.

So wish me luck.

Peace.

Tags: women

So I didn’t make it out to experience THE BIGGEST SHOPPING DAY OF THE YEAR! Or as I like to call it, THE BIGGEST GODDAMN LINES OF THE YEAR day.

Are you freaking kidding me? So let me get this straight: Corporate America TELLS us that Friday after Thanksgiving is the biggest shopping day of the year. So everyone just decides to go shopping because of that one largely unsubstantiated claim? Man, it’s like the Valentine’s Syndrome, I swear -- They say you should buy chocolates on February 14th, so you do…

So I hate overcrowded places, and thus I wasn’t anywhere special yesterday, except at work. Which isn’t that special. Or crowded.



Speaking of Work
Remember when I said that at least 3 people would call with that dumb saying? Yeah, I’m that good that I can call it in advance.

No, but seriously, it’s not that I’m that good, but rather that I know my demographic rather well:
•South of the Mason-Dixon.
•Finished 3rd grade. That’s it.
•Sign their name as “X”
•Currently dating his sister. Again.


Don’t blame me, blame the education system, man. And uncle/Cousin Herb. Yeah, I went there.



Nightmares from the Gym
OK, so the last month or so I’ve been on a different regimen. I’ve been trying to concentrate on my arms, doing a bicep/tricep day every 3 days. The thought was to overload them and make them grow, making sure that their status and size were not due to a once-a-week workout schedule.

Turns out, that wasn’t it. Man, after the first week, now it seems like I’m just bored at the gym. I mean, I know what’s going to happen when I get there, and it’s so frequent (3 times a week) that it seriously feels like I’ve just done it. Having said that, however, I must admit that today my arms felt more “pumped” than they had in a while.

Also in this edition of Nightmares from the gym: The huge guy who weighs the same as me. WTF. The other day I’m at the gym doing the same workout as today, which I guess means this was 3 days ago. This guy was sitting on an upright bench looking like he was feeling out for a spotter. They were heavy weights, after all.

During some later conversation, he mentioned his weight. This HUGE CHUNK of a man was 185lbs. Just so you know, that’s MY WEIGHT. Yeah, that just isn’t fair. We have the same weight, he’s only like one inch shorter than me, and… he’s like 8x my size. Yeah, not fair.



The Enlightenment continues…
Ana called me today whilst I was at work, and shared this great news: she just bought a new Macbook. You, too, should buy a new Macbook. Or an iMac. Or a Macbook Pro.

I don’t recommend the Mac Pro, however, unless you’re really in need of drastic power. And if I know you personally, you don’t need that much power, trust me.

And for some of you out there, I would probably recommend MY PowerBook G4 1.67ghz w/ 17” screen Laptop. So, like, I can get a new Macbook Pro 17” Core 2 Duo. Because I need it more than you, dammmit! I do photo work!

Yeah, her having a new laptop with a built-in camera to do the video thing with really really makes me want a new one. Frown :-(. Maybe I can talk the girl into them for the both of us. Smile :-)

Peace. Hopefully a new laptop, too :-D

Tags: Apple, hate, Gym

Well, had Thanksgiving @ home with the family. I like to help, but mother pretty much takes over the cooking and leaves no one with any direction on how to do anything to help. Since I don’t want to be accused later of being a freeloader, I find something to do. Usually it’s cleaning up.

This process does not begin at the end of the meal, though; I start cleanup while everything is going on, that way I’m lookin’ busy, and also it keeps the workload more even. See, this way I can get a load of dishes and pots out of the way (maybe two loads) before the main course. Then when the main course is over, it’s just rinse and put in the washer. Easy as pie. French Apple pie…


...You Communist Terrorist Double-Crossing Bastard Spy
Also went to see the new Bond, Casino Royale. The movie was acted and shot well, but hell if I know what the fuck actually happened. Really, at this stage, all I know is that James Bond lived, a couple hot girls died, and Bond knows everything I do not.

Now, I can’t rate it lower because I’m too dumb to follow what’s going on. I’ll give it an easy A, and just make sure I stick to movies that tell me the plot well in advance. You know, stuff like Star Wars and Tombstone, where you know who the bad guys are and what’s going to go down well in advance.

Though I’ll give myself some credit for knowing the pretty girl was going to die (had to if this the first Bond, right?), figuring that she was either a double agent or caught in the middle of something bigger. Yay to me.


What’s with Dallas?
Suddenly they’re not half-bad? Hogwash. I want them to report to my chambers immediately; this is not according to plan. I swear, it’s like the ultimate reversal of what I had intended: Terrell Owens stinks like something I’m bound to leave in the bathroom later today, and Dallas is doing OK.

Along those lines, actually, I’m thinking I’m going to abandon Owens’ bandwagon. Dude’s dropping balls like his hands are taped closed. He used to have a ball-dropping problem a long time ago. But seriously, you should have practiced your way out of that by now. Sionara, sucker.



Dumb Southerner of the Day
I know I have yet to make it to work this morning, but let me place a bet that at least 3 –count them, THREE – dumb southerners will call and ask this question once I pick up the phone:
“Y’all open today?”

Nope. Once again, just happened to be near my office on my day off and thought I’d stop in and answer this ONE phone call, so that I could tell you this story and you’d know that in fact we weren’t open, even though I was here and answered the phone.

Peace.

Tags: hate

Stinging Nettle SUCKS! We had a nice hike yesterday. Well, except for the constant stinging and dull pain in my legs. Wore shorts when I went because it was going to be relatively warm (76º for the high). I usually wear these cheap hiking pants that have zip-off lower legs to make them shorts. They also have some adjustable elastic at the bottom of the full leg, so I usually keep them up while on the trail or around water by just having the elastic tight enough to hold them up, then pull them down when I get to brush.

Which is probably why I had yet to experience the joy of stinging nettle on this trail before yesterday. And Joel wore shorts too, so luckily we’re suffering together, hehehe… It’s just too bad that poor, poor Miles also wore shorts and got some stinging sensations. Oh wait, he doesn’t wear clothes, the lucky dog…

I have two – count them, TWO – pairs of those hiking pants I like so much. But they’re about 2 years old now, and one pair doesn’t have the button anymore due to constant use, and the other ones were mysteriously at the bottom of the laundry pile, and I didn’t want to offend Joel on our first date.

Fooey.



Colts snatch Defeat from the…. DAMMIT! They LOST!!
To DALLAS?!! Are you SERIOUS?!?! GUYS!! What’s going on, huh? I mean, they’re Dallas, they’re no good… And there you were, all 9-0 and everything, and let Dallas knock you off.
I’m writing them. They cost me a dollar this week in my pool at work, and I expect to be reimbursed. And I can’t help but wonder if this has something to do with me going hiking instead of watching the game. No matter, I shouldn’t have had to watch that game to guarantee victory, so there’s no way I’m taking the blame for this.

They keep this up, I’m going to root for San Fran no matta what, even if they’re not playing.
Just kidding. San Fran sucks more than Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman a hoover on a power spike.



Microsoft Releases Poop. I mean, Zune. No, Wait, I mean Poop
Read this and laugh. Laugh at Microsuck. And then go here and enlighten yourself. Windows using chumps…. Haven’t you all figured out yet that they can’t write software to save their lives? Seriously folks, the last decade has been a farce, and you all have had the wool pulled over yer eyes. Now get real and get a Mac.

And then donate to my fund so I can get a new one. Thanks.



Another Hiking Injury
I also managed to use a NEW set of trail running shoes yesterday that had yet to break in properly. Now, I absolutely love these shoes (I bought two pairs), but if they’re not broken in? They rub the living hell out of my achilles. And my achilles are really really sore right now. ...Because they weren’t broken in yet. See, I wear ankle socks, and these shoes have this really high “thingy” in the back for no real reason other than to irritate my achilles until it softens up enough that it doesn’t irritate my achilles. Dammit. Again.

Oh well. I’ll live, I think. And I think achilles will survive this momentary overuse.

Peace.

I had a battery charger for my camera. I can’t remember precisely the last time I used it, but by the level of my battery and the amount of pictures I have taken recently, I figure it couldn’t have been that long ago…

Hell if I can find it, though. Gone. Lost in the night. Lost in the morning. I am not sure, but maybe it is on that island with those people from Oceanic Flight 815 that crashed on September 22, 2004. Look, I know that was a long time ago, but with that show anything is possible. They may have my battery charger. Dammit.

...There’s also a possibility that I did not pull it out of my old laptop bag and put it into my NEW laptop bag that I got about a month ago. Dammit. Again.



Ultimate Farting Championship 65
Yes, dang it, I watched it. Reluctantly. Joey Numbers came over to watch USC make his Cal Bears look bad, and sometime around 5:00 minutes left in the 4th, decided he’d rather watch a real beating from the UFC. So we travelled down to watch Tim “The Maniac” Sylvia defeat Jeff Monson. I’d seen Tim Sylvia fight before somehow, and I was sort of rooting for him to lose, because he’s a jackass. A 6’8”, 265lb, flabby, slim-shouldered fuck of a person sort of jackass.

But instead he won, which disappointed me. Frown :-(. However, up next was the Welterweight championship which was the main event for the night.

What really got me watching this was their physiques. Yes, I know that sounds gay, but whatever. I go to the gym and work my ass off to try and build a certain physique for myself, & honestly I spend more of my time checking out men than I do women. And here I am, at a pretty lean and mean 180lbs or so, and these 170 pounders looked much bigger/more ripped than I. How the hell is this possible? How is it that my arms are so skinny whilst theirs appear as little cannons? I am disgusted with myself right now. Frown :-(.

So what’s it going to take? These damn 170lb guys look more ripped than me at 10lbs heavier and ALSO in good shape.

Maybe I’ll just give up the ghost on this one. Dammit. Eh, my mood will probably change with the wind; next week it’ll be the determination I need to show up at the gym I’m sure. Or not, whatever.



Going Hiking today
YAY! It’s like the first time in like 6-8 months that I’ve gone. Going to Mount San Antonio, AKA Mt. Baldy ‘round here. It’s a nice local mountain on the outskirts of the Angeles Nat’l Forest, about some 30-40 minutes away in traffic from here to parking. Nice little trails, mostly it’s a nice little day escape from the smog of So Cal.

Joey Numeros will be accompanying me on this journey, as will my trusty companion Miles. Yes, Miles will be going with me this fine day. We’ve been going running more often recently and his attitude & activity level has picked up accordingly, so I figure since this is the first time in a long time for me, Joel, and Miles, we can settle for a shorter hike and all share the same level of soreness tomorrow.

This is how I discovered that my camera battery charger was missing. I awoke around 6:30 thinking that I should probably charge my batteries for the hike, seeing as how I never leave home w/o the camera and this is a great opportunity to taketh some photos.

But an hour later and, well, see above. Oh, and don’t bother asking why I awake with ideas and plans that make sense; I haven’t a clue myself.



Also in the Strange Awakenings Dept
Since I got going on that, thought I’d share this strange little bit of info about myself. You know how you have that song stuck in your head that you heard last and it just won’t go away? You keep humming it all day, you can’t seem to shake it.

Well, when I wake up in the morning, I have a song stuck in my head, too. And it’s never the song I heard last. In fact, it’s usually some song that I haven’t heard in a LONG time. Yes, I wake up almost every morning singing some new song that has absolutely no connection to any events from the previous day or the playlists I have listened to in that day.

I’m like a one-man iTunes or something. Except I don’t burn CD’s. Well, to be honest, I haven’t tried, but I’m not sure where I’d even be able to insert them.

And no, I don’t want your opinions on where I should try, either, so don’t bother.

Peace.

I wanna be a hero. They’re so cool! Oh, and the show is neat, too.

I like the show. It’s sort of it’s own version of Lost on ABC, but it has a slight different view on how to take the show. For me, the two work together as a source of entertainment; Heroes provides me the instant gratification that Lost does not, in that the plot unfolds a little more before your eyes in each successive episode – you feel like you’re getting more info. Lost is like the book that everyone loved and is now required reading at all the major institutions, while Heroes is like the Hollywood remake of the original work, with a faster-paced tempo and the infamous bitching about how it’s not as good as the book, yada yada.

But they’re both shows, so you may not get what I’m saying, and in fact many will probably say that Heroes is better. But I say Heroes can do what it does BECAUSE Lost is what it is, and has really sort of begat the genre and defined what it is, modifications to follow.

Heroes: Lost for the ADD-afflicted. Yes, that means you, Roger.



Off to See Borat?
The girl won a free movie ticket to the movies (go figure!) from work the other day. Want to go see this movie sort of, so this is a good excuse. Thing is planning it. The girl and I both want to see it, as do a few friends of mine, so the problem is scheduling a trip that allows us all to go see it.

Because I don’t want to be obligated to go see it again if it sucks. Just in case, you know?



I think I’m half-way there
I really think I’ll have the girl begging me to get a new Core 2 Duo Macbook Pro in a couple of weeks. I may have to get her one as well, but that’s a risk I’m willing to take. Hey, you gotta keep the woman happy, right? It’s just a matter of convincing her that a new C2D Macbook Pro would make her happy.



This Just in: Fed-Ex Delivers!
So you heard about Brit-Brit and K-Fed splitting, right? So now he’s been nicknamed Fed-Ex. And with his record, it could be construed that he does indeed deliver.

Shit, a week or two more and he could be delivering your newspaper, so watch out.

Fuck, he could be Santa Claus. Lord knows he delivered about a shred of hope to millions of young men around the world in this deal. Brittany on the market? Yeah, I know a handful of people that I’ve been too afraid to shake their hands of recent. I’m not saying, you know…. I’m just sayin’.



Running: Sucking in a Neighborhood Near You
So I’ve been unhappy with my backslide in the tone of my mid-section of late. See, I used to do my abs and run twice a week, but for the last 8-10 months or so, I’ve been doing it once every 7-10 days. You think with each opportunity passed hey, it’s only one day of running; it won’t affect me that much, but truth be told it adds up, just like everything else.

Bad news is it’s absolutely kicking my ass right now. Good news is Miles is all chipper and getting in great shape again, too. Bad news is it’s kicking my ass right now. Wait, did I say that already?

I always told people that I don’t run for my legs, I run for my midsection. And while I said that and believed it for the most part, boy do I believe it now. I mean, I’ve now gone running and done my abs twice in 5 days, and I can tell a difference. If only my muscles responded that fast, I’d be a 240 lb. beefcake right now. No, seriously. I have been doing this more or less gung-ho for the last 5 years, with about 10 lbs a year to show for it. If I could elicit the same sort of response time out of my muscle growth… yeah, I think around 240 lbs would be right.
Then I could trim down to a cut 220 lb and be happy. Finally.



Thongs or Panties?
The girl has been a thong wearer for years and years now. However –and this stays between you and me, OK? – she’s been having breathability issues lately, and read that thongs are more or less unhealthy for reasons I feel I must keep from you for your own protection. So she’s considering going to regular-type cotton panties.

And you know what? I’m not the least bit disappointed. There’s something about a sexy form-fitting panty that just turns me on more than a thong. I mean yes, thongs show more, but to me they don’t follow and accentuate the natural lines of a woman’s body.

I guess I’m weird. Well, I know I’m weird, this is just another sign of the obvious, huh? Whatever. Watch the opening scene of Lost in Translation and you’ll understand what I mean.

Peace.

Tags: women

I fucking hate the Santa Ana (Santana - there, are you happy, Jaxan?) winds. I wake up this morning to my skin being ripped from my body as I walked outside to feed my puppies.

And to think that mere days ago I was saying how lucky we have been that the Santa Ana winds have not been harsh this year. Honestly, though, these are just warmup winds; they’re pretty calm considering what they are. I’m used to steady winds above 60 mph, with gusts well into the triple digits. I mean, check out the satellite photo above. You can actually SEE the wind ripping the soil from 50-100 miles inland and blowing it just as far into the ocean. This shit ain’t no joke.

It’d better fucking rain/snow around here this year. There’s been so much heat and so little precipitation… Plus, I want to go hiking in the snowy mountains local to me, so they better damn well BE snowy! I have taken some of my best photos during the snowy months from the San Antonio mountains, and I’d like to get some more. Here’s to hoping.



The Futility of Dusting in So Cal
Especially when the winds blow. See, all this place is is brown dirt over hear and over there. The winds come, even ever so slightly, and it just puts whatever you moved around back, plus some.

I’m staring down the top of our curio cabinet, thinking that the dusting the girl did this week really looks as though it never happened, and that oiling the wood is probably only exasperating the dust issue; it has something to stick to now. Seriously, dusting around here is on an hourly basis.

Yet another reason to move up north.



Reason to NOT move up north
Been cold. Well, let me clarify: It’s been cold HERE. The last few mornings I’ve gone to feed the dogs (barefoot), the concrete has been murder on my soles. And it’s relatively warm here, only dipping to the low 50’s overnight, with the occasional high 40’s thrown in. Man, am I ready for more continuous trips below the 40º range, with the highs not mounting much of an attack at only 50-65 degrees a day?

We’ll see, I guess. I’m willing to try it out. I think it may just be a matter of getting used to it. Hopefully. Because I love it up there otherwise.



Boobs rock
I have no idea why. They just do. I can’t explain it, I can only stand in awe of their almost universal appeal. And drool; I can do that, too. Whoops, need to go wipe my chin.

Peace.

Tags: earth conditions, women

Last night, went to see Harsh Times starring Christian Bale and NO ONE ELSE. I think this act may have sealed my secret man-crush; I’ll have to check with the judges.

Verdict on the film? Harsh. As in man, making it through that whole movie without walking out was harsh. The acting was good, but there were so many deficiencies. The homeboy talk was WAAAAYYYY overdone, to the point that a fork would have bent trying to go through this piece. The machismo was even more overdone. The girlie girls they promoted as cute would make great contestants on any makeover show. The plot was weak and really went nowhere, except for 2 hours into my doomed future.

They had only a couple of showings last night. By the time we got finished at the gym (yeah, still doing that despite…), it was already closing in on 6pm, and we hadn’t eaten. You might guess where this is going, so let me skip ahead gently by saying that after a wonderful dinner @ Chili’s, we went to the Apple Store and then on to Kohl’s to waste much time before the show began at 10:40pm. Needless to say, after the show I was a little disappointed that it was now 1am and I had to work the next morning, and would have to get up early so that I could write about how much the movie sucked.

Boy are my arms tired. Or something like that.



Yeah, Apple Store again
Yeah. I know, I’m addicted. But still, they’re shit is cool. The girl was with me this time, and I wanted to show her the speed bump performance in the new laptops, and also show her my findings on the glossy screen vs matte screen. Mainly, I wanted to convince her that I should really get one. And maybe her, too :-). Both of us equipped with 17-inchers, baby! That and in case she buys me one, I want to make sure it’s everything I want, dammit! Yeah, right. Hey, poor peeps can dream too, OK?

Bottom line: I wants me one like yesterday.



Kohl’s, too
The girl brought some stuff with her that she had gotten from grandma for her special day this month (no, not that one; it’s due next week, I think). The shirts with either too small or too something, so we brought them back to exchange for some new workout pants or something like that. At least, that’s what I was told, probably so I’d go along with it.

Also on the agenda: Cheating. Yeah, cheating. She brought some pants devoid of any tags on them back to Kohl’s to return. Only thing was, they were from Jesus Christ Penny. So we got to sit around for a while as the customer service people tried to figure out what to do. Moral I learned: Cheating is OK if they’re just going to resell it anyways. Straight from the girl’s mouth, so it must be true, right? Girls don’t lie…

On the brighter side, I found a really nice polyester jacket in a nice, earthy brown (probably my best color) marked down to $40 from over $80. Myself, the girl, and the lady at the register I asked to check the price on it for me all thought I looked good in it. So we bought it, and I was told I couldn’t complain about cheating because it bought me my jacket. So I’m not complaining.



Dumb Southerner of the Day
Look, if we are in the market of MUSTANG PERFORMANCE PRODUCTS, would it not seem likely that we probably have no idea what you need for an old Jaguar? Thought so.

But damned if people don’t call with the strangest requests and then get indignant when you can’t help them or inform them that we specialize in only mustangs.
“yeah but I figured since Ford owns Jaguar you might know.”

Pardner? Know what? McDonald’s sells chicken, too, but hell if I’m going to ask them for healthy eating advice.

I wonder if the south is full of really fit people, because they seem so good at jumping to conclusions.

Peace.

Tags: hate, Gym

You may remember a post where I stated that Kate was actually in love/like with the Doctor. Well, I take it all back. Yea, although it may be too late to take back as the last episode pretty much showed otherwise, I still take it back.



Now accepting your eternal forgiveness
So the last few weeks have seen me playing with my facial hair. I shaved up a real, full goatee, then as the rest grew out, I shaved up a beard. Or I could be real clever and say I began playing God with my facial hair. Because I look like Jesus.

So bow to me and give me your soul or something. I can’t promise heaven, but hey, I look the part. All I need is some robes, ‘cause I hear that clothes make the man. So robes, lockes of hair, and a Jesus beard I figure pretty much make me God at this point.

Yeah right. Like I want people following me around asking stupid freaking questions all the time. Could you imagine? Me? Yeah, not me either.



There’s Hope for us all
Democrats win both sides of the congress. Hooray. Now let’s get busy undoing all the damage the liars -- er, republicans -- have done over the last 6 years.

Here’s a funny quote for all of you:
“U.S. stocks finished higher for a third straight gain after Rumsfeld's resignation and Democratic gains fueled hopes for a change in Iraq policy and reduced government spending.” -- Yahoo News

REDUCED Government spending. What’s funny about that is it’s always a republican mantra that they’re for reducing government waste and spending, and they blame the democrats for frivolous spending on bogus or wasteful government programs. Yet, it’s the DEMOCRATS who balanced the budget most effectively, whilst the liars -- er, republicans -- have spent the better part of the last 6 years not only undoing the budget SURPLUS the dems left them with, but marched right along to put us in the hole faster than we could say Weapons of Mass Destruction 6 times fast.



Well, Hope for all... Except me
I go to the gym just because I hate myself, I think. There’s High school kids with physiques I’d kill to have, yet never will get. And I don’t even think there’s enough rope around the house to really express how I feel. Maybe a sideways sad face will do:
:-(

Eh, that didn’t really help much. Maybe next time I’ll magically get huge and all will be right with the world. Until next time, then.

Peace

Tags: Gym

At least that’s what I think. Because since I wrote about it, he’s been all in-shape and stuff, looking spry at every turn. And I really don’t put reading by him. He’s smarter than some people I know… So hopefully – HOPEFULLY – he’s not going downhill anytime soon. Maybe if I can keep him on the frequent outings regimen he’ll be good until he’s twenty.
Hip-Hip-Hooray for Miles, let me hear it now.



Cancel the Unfunny One
Really, why are we keeping American Dad on life support? Pull the gawdamn plug already, sheesh. I mean look Seth, I love Family Guy, but there’s just something missing from American Dad. Like comedy, for one, and timing for another.

What makes this show so unfunny? I can’t quite figure it out. I think that maybe it might have to do with how the points are just handed to you, there’s no real sudden realization that someone was just made a fool of. Well maybe not, Family Guy is pretty good at that, too, it’s just that they’re direct about it while AD beats around the bush. I guess it’s more like a bad magic trick.
You know, like some guy gives you a nickel and tells you to put it your pocket, then says “OK, now see this shiny nickel I’m holding? ALAKAZAM!! It’s magically in your pocket now,” and you’re like, “OK… see, that wasn’t cool because you had me put a nickel in my pocket like 10 seconds ago if I recall.” And that’s my estimation of American Dad, really. They hand you the punch line then spend the rest of the show trying to dress it up like something else, only to give you the same punch line again. And lord knows you can only put so much lipstick on a pig, and it won’t matter because we’ll still know it’s Rosie O’donnell under there so just stop wasting our time.

I think I can sum up AD in one word: suck. And not the good kind where I fall asleep afterward, either, nope; the bad one, the bad one.



So Winter is more a state of mind anyway, right?
I mean, what with the 90º temperatures and all. Have I mentioned I hate this place? Well if not, I’m covered. And if so, then save that one for another day.

I feel sorry for Santa having to drive his sleigh around in this heat. Sorry, Santa. I’m getting some good shit (er, stuff) this year, right? Right?



Aperture makes me regret my last blog
So not 4 hours after I finished writing a blog about how I don’t need the newest computers, I find myself trudging through my Aperture library trying to find pictures that would make good Black & White converts for a Client. And man, did I really really REALLY want the new laptop then. I mean, we got through it – eventually – but only with lots of slowdowns and much general waiting involved. Eh. Might find myself sweet-talking the girl (read: sexing her up FREQUENTLY) to get this one. How many times do you read that, huh?

Screw it. I mean, it’s not like I need to take photos, right? So really, I should just get rid of the camera and stuff and just be happy. Maybe sell this laptop and get a Pentium 266mhz running DOS or something.

Yeah right. OK bob, time to hit the gym and get in shape!

Peace.

Tags: Apple

I have no idea why, really. It started last Sunday afternoon, and has been really really tight ever since then. Don’t know what started it, either. What’s weird though, is that it goes away as soon as I start lifting weights. Yeah, strange, I know. Maybe I need to work for Cal-Trans or something. Or on a chain gang.



Computer Situation
OK, as much as I WANT the new Apple laptops, I don’t need one. This one does its thing magically well, and there’s really only a handful of times that it could use a speedup for what I do. I don’t make my living on it (as of yet), so it’s not that important, I guess.

So here’s what I’ve decided: My next computer purchase will be dependent on Joel’s wishes. If he wants to spend the dough and buy mine sometime in the near future to replace what was taken from him, then I’ll pick one up now. If he does not want to buy mine off of me in the near future, then I’ll wait. Simple as that. I figure that this way, I can stop thinking about it. If Joel wants this one, I have a plan. If he doesn’t, I have a plan. No more trying to decide.

Joel? No pressure. I’m fine with keeping this one as I’m fine with getting a new one. Do what’s best for you, sir!



Another Decision Made Easy
I checked; I thought I preferred the Matte Finish on my PowerBook over the Glossy finish you can order on the new Macbook Pros. When last I was at the Apple Store however, they had a Macbook (glossy) next to a Macbook Pro (matte). And I’m a convert, now.

Things I came to realize about the Glossy screen:

•They’re brighter. At the same setting, the Glossy was always brighter.
•They have a better range of view in lit environments.
•LESS glare. Counterintuitive, yes, but true.
•Sharper picture. Probably due to the lack of a light diffusion layer.
•Better colors; Blacks are more black.


I know that the matte finish is supposed to cut glare, and in a way it does, if the light is small, insignificant, and indirect. But what I noticed is that while the glossy does have reflections, if you’re not looking at them, they’re not a bother. I liken it to those 3-D pictures: You just have to look past the 2-D flat picture to see the 3-D image. But with the matte finish, when a large enough light source is in range, it is diffused by the finish and you simply can’t see past the spot on your screen; it can become an obstruction.

Needless to say, my next laptop purchase will include a Glossy screen. Not that the Matte finish is garbage; I still love my computer and its screen, but I think my personal preference is the glossy.



More than $20? Count me out
We went out to dinner with my family last night to an “exquisite” french restaurant called Ge’rards in Riverside. Know what? The meal I had was pretty good. Good enough to cost $40? No fucking way in hell.

I’m sorry if it makes me a poor sport, but I really would rather go out to TGIFriday’s and get me a large Jack Daniel’s Sirloin for half the cost, and then splurge for dessert. The plate came and I was like, “no, I ordered off the Grown-ups menu; please bring me an adult-sized steak, thanks.” Shit, at TGIF or Outback or something, I get twice the food for half the cost. Oh, and the waiters don’t treat me like I’m not supposed to be there, either.

Maybe I’m a simpleton, but whatever. To me, a meal like that is never worth it, even if someone else pays (someone else paid). Because then I feel really bad that they spent that kind of money and I’m not even full. And you know what? I’m not one for “rich” foods that are drenched in sauce like that. I like lightly basted foods with clean, light textures. You should have seen the amount of butter they used to cook the dessert in. I felt like I was going to have to give Malcolm (stepdad) mouth to mouth in short order until the paramedics arrived. No offense, old chap, but
your lips are not my style!

So I guess I’ll continue being cheap and happy. Bread and water, y’all. Or if I’m at work, Togo’s or Kimo’s. And water.



My Shirts Stink
I don’t know what it is, but when I go to the gym, my shirts always wind up stinking. Look, I know what you’re thinking, and trust me, it’s not me. If I take off my shirt, I don’t stink. If I go running (during which I don’t wear a shirt) and sweat, I don’t stink. Only my shirts stink when I sweat at the gym. And it doesn’t even smell like my B.O., it’s some entirely different funk. Hell, my B.O. Really isn’t stinky -- the girl likes my sweat smell, but neither of us can take this stench from my workout shirts. And what’s more, it’s not like they’re stinking two days later in the hamper, oh no; they stink right then and there at the gym after about 30 minutes. While it’s still on me.

Confused, I am. Maybe my sweat is reacting with my laundry detergent? Who knows. At this point, it’s only a matter of time before I end up at the gym naked.
But don’t worry: I’ll bring a towel to wipe down the equipment :-)

Peace.

Tags: hate

Joel and his lil’ sis’ met me at the local Apple Store in Victoria Gardens. They walked in, saw the white Macbook, and bought it on the spot. Yay, a new enlightened soul joins the world!



The Bad
When Joel got home, he called me. To inform me that his apartment had been broken in to. What fucking assholes. I mean, here is the wonderful example of a human being (me. OK OK OK; Joel…), who has been working so hard to make ends meet and maybe get a little few extras here and there for himself when he can. And some assholes come along and take from him what is not rightfully theirs.

Things like this really make me question the nature of human beings. And makes me wonder: do criminals such as “The Defendant” really deserve any sort of leeway? I mean, if they are willing to take without question or concern, why should the we, the good people, give to them what they refuse to give to us: consideration and due respect as individual human beings. Huh?



The Ugly
I’m still just 5’11” and 180 lbs. And, uh, ugly. Damn.



Silver Lining
As we left the Apple store, where I played with the NEW Core 2 Duo Laptops – which by the way I REALLY WANT NOW – Joel questioned what I’d do with my Current PowerBook 1.67GHZ G4 17”, I told him I’d sell it. He asked how much. Because he wants to buy it. And now that his laptop is missing? Now may be the time, sooner rather than later, to join the enlightened.

Joel: Seriously, I didn’t arrange this; I’m Sicilian, yeah, but I’m not that Sicilian. I love you. If you need someone to talk to, call me. Just say so, and I won’t even mention Apple or Laptops. Hell, I won’t even mention fruit of any kind, or even say anything relating to computer while we talk!

Though we DO need to discuss $$ if you want to do it. As in, if we’ve settled on a price for the laptop, do you wanna spend a few extra and get the EXTRA goodies I have bought with it? For instance, I have an EXTRA battery, an iSight Camera, etc etc. We can discuss that when it comes, man. But hey, at least you’ll have a Mac.



And in Closing
Fuck whitey, niggers, spics, wetbacks… um, rednecks… let’s see…. Chinks… Who else could have been responsible for the atrocities wrought upon the innocent? How about this: Fucking assholes. Fuck the fucking assholes. Fuck the fucking assholes in the fucking ass like the dogs they are. Like “The Defendant,” for instance.

Too much? Yeah, sorry.

Peace.

Tags: hate