Mar 2007
Appliance Hunting, HOT, & a new Laptop?
The Appliance HuntToday, with our legs too sore to go running like we had planned, and not much else to do, The Girl & I decided we were going to go and have a decent lunch & then window shop some appliances at Sears. We wanted to see what was out there and see if our tastes were still about the same.
Things we like in refrigerators: Roller-bearing drawers. Yes indeed, these are very, very nice. In fact, a necessity in my opinion. The girl is willing to give in this department; I’m willing to divorce if necessary over it. We also demand stainless steel exteriors. Caveat to that: we want the ones that are stainless steel or brushed or whatever. The real hook is that some have a finish over them or are finished in such a way as to prevent smudges and fingerprints. Another thing I found was that very few of these refrigerators actually have the stainless steel all the way around; they usually have the regular black or silver plastic on the sides, which displeases me. It wouldn’t be a bother except that every house I have ever lived in, you could see the sides of the refrigerator. Therefore, they must have the complete stainless steel enclosure. Downside is that we couldn’t find one that was the smudge-proof stainless all the way around. Boo hoo. Maybe we’ll be able to special order. We hope. We all hope. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry….
Washers and Dryers? We changed our minds today. The whole time, we’ve gone back and forth on the top-load HE Kenmores or the front-load kenmores. Today, we decided on the front-load models because: while the top-load HE’s use 47% less water and energy, the front-loads use 71% less. Yikes! Though I must mention that we’ll probably go with the LG models, due to the facts that (a) they cost around $150 less, and (b) they have .2 Cu. Ft. More than the Kenmore models.
And color? Pretty much anything but white. Probably red or blue. We’ll see.
Warm? No, HOT
OK, 80º is hot. Really. That’s how hot it was here today. They predicted 78º, we got 81ª, and boy am I so very ready to leave the desert.
I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO USE MY A/C IN MARCH. Seriously; I’m sending out the memo today. Consider yourself pre-notified.
Also during our trip today
After Sears, we stopped by a place next door called “Home Gallery.” What is it? It’s like Toys “R” Us for the Kitchen-obsessed. Wow, this place rocked. From the tile selection to the one-piece countertops to the under-counter stainless steel sinks, we fell in love with the first model kitchen we saw. Bummer was it was all nailed down. If you happen by one of these places and consider yourself a Kitchen-obsessed individual, seriously, you should stop in. You never know, sometimes dreams can come true!
Favorite thing about our visit there? The drawers and cabinets in the first model (the one we fell in love with, you’ll recall) all had these really cool roller-bearing setups, whereby as they got to about ½-inch from closing, it sort of takes over. Yeah, if you slam them shut? It goes fast until it gets to that last ½-inch, then closes it the rest of the way gently. And if you slowly close it? Once it gets to that point, it takes over for you and closes it the rest of the way. Gently.
I almost cried.
Girl not down with my suggestion
We left around 4:15 to get home, so that The Girl could get ready in time for work. We had some leeway, so I suggested that we could stop by the Apple Store just across the way and pick me up a brand new Macbook Pro 17” Core 2 Duo Laptop. You know, for my troubles.
Needless to say, I’m typing this blog from my 2 year old PowerBook G4. Girls can be so mean sometimes, I swear. I think I’m going to have to withhold sex or something on this one – I don’t see myself getting a new computer any other way. Or perhaps bribery. You know, something along the lines of “OK, you get the old-style cupboard handles and Designer Faucets, I get the Macbook Pro. Deal?” Could work. Depends on which week I catch her in: bad week = broken limbs for suggesting. And that’s just life with women though, ain’t it?
Peace.
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Working on My Day Off, & Michael Jackson
Day off of work – Still a lot of workScheduled this Tuesday off of work. So that I could take some time to make some calls and maybe get some good information about getting a job near Eureka, CA (yeah, still doing that whole thing). See, I get to work at about 6:45am, and don’t get home until after 3pm or so. Too early to call before work, too late afterward, and wouldn’t you know it, but a current employer doesn’t seem much to appreciate it when you call on other employment options while on their clock.
After the first phone call though, I couldn’t help but think to myself that I had wasted a day’s pay to make a 10-minute conversation happen. Until 3 hours later, when I realized that maybe I had take another day off soon to do the same thing once more again!
So? How did it go? Well, not too much happened. Called some employment services, and they pretty much verified what I have found to be true myself in my own research: it’s hard as hell to find a job in a market when you’re not there. So in a couple of weeks, I’m planning on taking a whole week to go up, meet, interview, and get a damn job. Hopefully. Gulp. I also filled out some more applications and submitted a few more resumés. Let’s cross our fingers that something works, huh? Now. Cross your fingers now. I'm watching you.
Transformers: Michael Jackson’s attempt to molest millions of kids at once
Seen this news? Wow. I mean, wow. It makes me want to spontaneously forget I ever loved Transformers or Voltron as a kid. Hell, makes me want to forget my whole childhood, just in case, you know?
Tell me this: Why doesn’t he just become a priest and complete the whole circle of life thing or whatever? He’s almost there – white male, low on sex, likes little boys. Sick, I know, you don’t have to say anything.
But on another scale, how cool is that? I mean, a 50-ft tall walking robot that shoots lasers. Let me repeat that: a 50-ft tall walking robot that shoots lasers. Imagine if you will for a minute this scenario: A plane of Japanese Tourists flying in to Las Vegas, looking out the starboard side, and they see… a 50-ft tall walking robot shooting lasers out of its eyes! Horry shit! Turn de prane around! Gojira! Gojira!
LOL. Yes, I’m the kind of person that would find that absolutely hilarious. Now grow up and admit that you are, too.
Peace.
Repairs, Burgers, & Dog food
Feelin’ the Love ()So, The Girl’s iBook mysteriously lost some functionality of the keyboard sometime between last Thursday & this past Monday. Can’t say for sure, because during this time, the laptop was not in our care. So dammit, we trek down to the local Apple () Store in Rancho Suckamonga. They’re extremely busy, and instead of fixing the thing, they direct us to make an appointment. Fine, that’s fine, except: The next appointment was not until Wednesday (that’s today). What really sucked about that is, before we left the house, I checked online to see if they had any appointments left for Monday, and it said no, but I could make an appointment for Tuesday. Which I did not. Obviously.
We had hoped to get lucky and get fit in somewhere. Nope.
Anyways. We ended up back there this evening. They looked at it, tried a key or two, and 20 minutes later (after some typing and signing here and there), new keyboard was installed, tested, and we left. Didn’t cost us a penny short of the drive and the gas. Well, and dinner I guess, because we wouldn’t have stopped out for a bite to eat had we not had an appointment at Victoria Gardens for the damn keyboard in the first place.
But I digress. Apple ()? Love ya. Thanks for all the fish or whatever they say. Really cool that you just replaced the thing without questioning why we lent the thing to someone else and how the hell the thing stopped working in the first place. Because honestly, I have no idea. Lightning, dudes. Aliens maybe. My best guess.
Farmer Boys: World’s Best NOT
Best Burgers? In the world? I dunno ‘bout that, boys. Maybe best burger within 30 feet, but depending on where you are, even that could be pushing it.
Oh, by the way: we stopped at Farmer Boy’s for dinner on the way to Victoria Gardens.
Look, the thing was easily edible. It had all the necessary ingredients. But it was missing flavor, and to me that’s kind of an important part of the whole burger equation. Meat, Cheddar cheese, bacon, bun, and FLAVOR! But hey, what should I expect out of a fast food burger joint, right? Now I remember why I don’t frequent that type of stop. Except for the chicken McNuggets. Because those rock, and you know it.
Poisoned Dog Food
The next time someone tells me that feeding my dogs table scraps is unhealthy, and that dog food is healthier for dogs, I’m going to pour them a big sloppy bowl of Eukanuba.
Yeah, whatever. My dog – all 10 ½ years of him – is the healthiest dog I’ve ever seen in my life. I watch his diet, feed him real food whenever available, and also make sure he gets plenty of exercise. Shit, slowing down finally or not, he still whoops my butt on our weekly (well, bi-weekly anymore if I’m being honest) 3-mile runs.
Moral of the story: Dogs evolved over thousands upon thousands of years eating our scraps. They’re doing OK. Why mess with success?
Peace.
Reno!, replaced, & Nap Time
Did I mention?We totally went and saw Reno! 911: Miami. This was awhile back (the month of Cupid), but I think I was busy or just didn’t care to share at the time. I’ve never seen the show, but the commercials always look so funny, and the previews looked like it could be a winner, so we took the bait. Er, chance. And it had been a while since I laughed as good as I did when we went to see this movie. For the first 5 minutes, that is.
OMG, was this thing spread about as thin as a MIchael Jackson alibi, man. The first 5 or so were really pretty good, most likely because it was like a little ditty (there’s that word again). But then they proceeded to spread another little ditty over 2 hours. 2 hours. Two hours. Two hours, y’all.
Funny enough, now I want to watch the show, though. I could see the 30 minute show, compiled mostly of shorter ditties, being hysterically funny. But it’s on Comedy Central. That’s a cable channel. And, as you may know, I am cheap. Cable Costs money. I don’t have cable.
How much sense does that make? I am too cheap to opt for cable or satellite, but I own a 52” HD LCD, a full surround system (Sony/JBL), and a Girl. All these things cost a good chunk of $$. Eh, I guess mostly it’s just that I don’t much care for TV programming. And also, I’m cheap.
The Pressure Mounts
Yesterday I found out that my employer found my replacement. He starts Monday. I have a pretty good relationship with my boss/employer, but I can’t help but feel a lump in my throat as I contemplate the ramifications of this.
And it’s not so much the fact that I’m being replaced; I knew I was, I told them to, told them I was planning on leaving this spring, so I would fill the position until that time, and that they should hire someone before I leave. It’s just that I expected I’d have a more important role in teaching this guy. The way they talk about it, it’s as though I’m so unimportant that now that he’s here, they can just shove me into a dark corner and all will be well with the world.
And seriously, I need a tan. I need a light corner with a view, facing south preferably (more sun exposure).
Does this mean I need to get a job real real really soon? I guess so. Shit, they didn’t even have enough respect to muscle me out! They just plain sat someone else in my chair and informed me just before I sat on his lap!
No, but the guy seems pretty knowledgeable, and seems to have the experience they were looking for. Hopefully it all works out for them. And hopefully, it all works out for me.
Gulp.
Looking forward to Tomorrow
And not the philosophical tomorrow like that little red-headed whiny orphan is always singing about. I mean the real deal, the next day, Saturday, March 17th, 2007. Because I’m not working, and I could use the sleep.
Man, this time change is screwing with my head. I wake up and I hit the snooze far too many times, then I’m not even sure that I’ve hit it, and I’m startled by how late it is. I hate daylight savings time, mans and womans. I think they should split the difference, set it back 30 minutes, and never, ever, EVER change the time again. Seriously. Energy savings? You’re freaking kidding me, right? Explain to my ass how the hell showing up to work an hour earlier (or later) can really save money. Guess what: work’s open for 10 hours. That’s 10 hours of lights, computers, servers, and everything else, regardless of when relative to the sun we start. Shit, if anything, we’re paying more in energy costs, because now it’s colder in the mornings. Which means the heater gets turned on. Good thinking, guys.
So in reality all they do is fuck with our sleep every 6 months or so. You know, just to keep us on our toes.
Peace.
Conspiracy, Sacha, & Moving (we hope)
No, but SeriouslyThe current administration is conspiring against the normies. They are trying their damnedest to install right-wing loyal anchormen all around the federal government, effectively turning us into the christian equivalent of the muslim “enemies.” No, seriously. It’s not just a theory when it really happens that way.
Thank god for email, by the way. Because now we know.
I must say though, that I look forward to the day when we realize arrogance and ignorance are the enemies; stupid people, regardless of other affiliations.
For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan
Watched Borat last night. There were some funny moments, but more than anything, I couldn’t help but feel that it was cruel to purposefully do to people exactly the opposite of whatever it was they typically experience/do/expect. Like the naked penis photos given to the Etiquette Coach. Or the way they disturbingly made demeaning cat calls to the Feminist group.
Another thing I thought about it was: what a missed opportunity. I mean, they could have made almost a real documentary out of this. They could have made a point. What I mean is, with the setup they were using, they got people to say things that normally they would not say, and got people to be themselves, thinking “only people in Kazakhstan are going to see this, not my neighbors…” You get an idea of what certain people really believe, not just what they tell you they believe. Like the anti-gay redneck, or the ultra-conservative chief justice.
They went for Silly-Funny. It could have been Scary-Funny.
Phone’s not Ringing; Not off the hook, either
So my phone is not lit up with people requesting – no, demanding – that I come work for them in Eureka. I checked the line, it works; I can make calls out and receive calls in. You know, those internet work from home advertisements are looking a lot more tempting now.
Me want go byebye. Sheeeeeeiiiit, the girl is bugging more than me. Weird, too, because at this time last year, I was chomping to get out of here, and she wanted to stay. Now, everyday when I get home, it’s “Did you get a job yet?” not “Welcome home, sweetie!” It’s “You’ve applied to more places, right?” not “Would you like a foot rub?” I keep hearing “You need to get online and find a job,” not “You’ve worked so hard today, would you like a foot rub?”
I could really go for a good foot rub about now.
Peace.
300, Stiffy, & How Mr. Farrell Got Famous
Mar 12, 2007 / 12:46 PM Filed in: Business Themes | Entertainment
I Told You SoSee? 300 breaks Box Office Records. Called it.
What are they smoking?
I was listening to a rather poor morning radio show (“The Morning Stiffy.” See what I mean? Best they could do was a penis joke), and they were criticizing the film’s battle scenes because “you felt like you were in the middle of 500 people fighting.” Seriously, what are they smoking? Yeah, see, that’s awesome. That’s what people like about films like that, is that you feel the adrenaline, you feel like you’re right in the middle of the action; they recreate for you the atmosphere a situation like that would create. That’s a success, people, not a failure!
See, this is what happens when people are dumb and can’t think of intelligent things to say: they say anything about topical events to try and sound as though they are relevant. What, you think maybe it is just their opinion, something they’re entitled to? I’m being to harsh, you say? OK, well maybe you should know that they also tried to compare it to “Saving Private Ryan.” And “The Matrix.” I stand by my estimation of their show. And now you do, too. I know, it’s OK, you don’t have to say you’re sorry.
Suddenly though, switching to this station from the other piss-poor station that work had us stuck listening to seems like a waste of time.
Someone Recently Asked….
If Will Ferrell made a deal with the devil. To which I asked, “In what sense?”
“You know, like in order to be famous, every movie he is in has to suck?”
“Hadn’t considered it like that. But you may be right.”
Blades of Glory. Give... Me... A break! Rather, give Will Ferrell a break, preferably the 3rd or 4th vertebrate. What has this guy done to be deserving of fame? He’s NOT FUNNY. Sorry, people, he’s not funny. Look, he can do bit parts, but feature films? Spare us, OK?
I have a semi-quasi-theory-idea-thought about all of this, actually. See, him, Adam Sandler (who can occasionally pull off a feature film), and the likes of Saturday Night Live had this wonderful idea to make lots of money off a 5-minute skit. Thing was, they were too fucking high at the time to realize that a 5-minute skit does not fill up 2 hours, and thus 5 minutes of comedy gets spread over 2 hours of bread. I might have messed up an analogy in there, but stick with me here, I’m making a point.
I refuse to see movies anymore by any crew of the SNL cast, especially when said proposed movie actually is an old skit (think “Superstar”). They just can’t do it. They have too many years of training in the 5-minute comedy routines, and they have proven enough times to me that they can’t adapt that to a full-length film. 99% of the time.
These raging moro– er, people, should stick with what got them to the dance: little bit parts. See Wedding Crashers for an idea of what I mean. Will Farrell in a movie? Only if he’s not starring and has a small, comic relief role that could almost be played by a cardboard cutout. Or COULD be played by a cardboard cutout, what the hell.
And, never, I mean NEVER, a movie with Jimmy Fallon in it. I hate him more than, than… well, I hate him a whole bunch. I wouldn’t recommend recommending me a movie with him in it. Should you, and I find out, I’ll hunt you down. Think a chair, chains, tape, a 13” color TV/VCR Combo, and a Copy of Taxi. And untold days of hilarity ensue.
Peace. And watch yourself…. BWAHAHAHAHA!!
Spartans, Popcorn, & Chuckie
300 (AKA: I’m more MAN than YOU!)Went and did the ditty this past Saturday evening. Well, I should say that me and The Girl tried to do that ditty on Saturday evening. But, by the time we got to the theatres, the showing sold out. And so we walked a short ditty (word of the day, by the way) to another set of theatres not too far away. And were informed they were sold out for all the shows up until about 11pm. So we walked back a short ditty to the original theatres, and stood in line, hoping to get tickets to a showing at around 10pm (because um, everything else was sold out until then). So by Saturday evening, I mean "almost Sunday Morning."
Needless to say, I think this film is going to break many box office records. Shit, we couldn’t even get into the show short of 10, and we got there around 8 or so. And we tried two different, LARGE theatres (AMC 30 and Edwards 22 in Ontario, CA), that had it playing like every half-hour.
How was it? Good. Not quite what I had expected, but it was a good film. The visuals were dreamy, the acting was pretty good, and the cinematography was excellent. Actually, I think that this review really put into words well what this film conjured up, or rather how it conjured up. Heck, that was the review that sealed it for me last night, that I had to go see it this night, right now (I have a copy of Borat sitting here, so there were options). But damn, do I want to look like King Leonidas now. What a freaking hunk of flesh, huh? And if I could get away with that beard, you best be sure I’d have started growing it out already!
Don’t go in expecting Gladiator on Steroids; you’d be a little off the mark. It’s a pretty well-rounded feature, with some history to be had, some comedy, some blood, some style, and a barrel-full of testosterone holding it all together. I’ll give it an A-, because it was pretty damn entertaining.
How Chance & “I told you so” collide
So we ended up watching the film at AMC, who graciously partnered with Discover card, who we cashed in our bonus for some free tickets and free popcorn (Popcorn!). So while we were standing in line waiting to get in, I decided to go wait in another line for free popcorn (Popcorn!). Hey, one line’s as good as another, right?
So impeccably, I get back to the movie line and they start to filter us in. Great. We seat, the movie is going to begin, and what happens? My dumb self damn near chokes to death on free popcorn. You see, I have this awesome ability to eat popcorn without any hands, and I also happen to eat too damn fast (thank the military for that one, folks). And, sitting there as the lights dim, I find I have a kernel (or those little parts that you know what I’m talking about), and I keep hacking because it’s right in that spot where when you relax, you gag. You know, between the side of your tongue and your throat.
And, quite in contrast to what The Girl wanted of me, I declined to buy a drink to wash down the popcorn. So as I am hacking trying to stay alive, The Girl is giving me “the look” that means “you dumbass, I told you so.” Then I totally outsmarted the damn throat thing, and used more popcorn to wash it down. And know what? After one or two more bites, it actually worked. Who would have guessed?
New Hottest Thing
Chuck Norris Jokes. B-rated jokes for a B-rate actor. Thing is, unlike 99.9% of his movies… These work. My favorite thus far?
“Chuck Norris doesn’t read books, he stares them down until they give him the information he wants”
Second Favorite? “When the Boogeyman goes to bed at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.”
Peace.
Internet & Applications
Internet finally isn’t “Inter-NOT”For the last few months, I have been recording issues with my DSL line at my home. The basic problem was that after about 6:30pm, my speeds would average about 600kbps with massive packet loss, and get as low as slower than dial-up. 600kbps might not sound too shabby, but when you consider that I’m paying for 3,000kpbs (actually more considering they figure on an 8-bit scale), you may see why I was concerned. What’s more, my speeds were “normal” during other hours. From like Midnight to 5:30pm, my speeds were as advertised, only beginning to suffer around 6 or so. And this prompted a call to at&t tech.
First things first, we speak with “Gloria” in India, who is very sorry that I am having this problem with my DSL by the way. I know because she made sure to mention it like 5 times. I've mentioned I hate India, right? Of course, as I have tried to explain to the whole of the Indian Nation on more than one occasion: they can’t help me. I’m not an idiot, it’s not that my computer is off or something stupid like that. It’s at&t’s fault, so get someone the fuck out here to take a look. Seriously, review the notes. I’ve had to call on this SAME ISSUE for the last 3 years, you can take my word for it. We have history, alright?
So the techs start coming by. I think I met everyone on the team, actually. They can’t figure it out, so they call the next tier up, and they do something and say it’s fixed. But they never tested it, so I call back. Still got the problem, boys and girls; you know the drill, let’s meet at my house, ‘K? Well, this goes on for like 3 months. After switching routers (not mine, mind, you, the internet router I’m hooked up to) no less than 10 times and having group tech sessions with someone at my house, someone at the main switch, people from the ISP, and line techs all working on the problem at once – on conference call – at least 3 different times, they finally got the problem solved just last night.
Finally. Now, my speeds are pegged at the high-end all night. And only 3 months later, too! Some people were griping that I was complaining, saying that I was just tying up resources. Nay nay, I say, as I’m paying for service they are not providing. And, the fact that I’m not usually home until about the time the internet becomes internot. And besides, this is their JOB, they should do it, and fix it. And if they can’t fix it, I should not have to pay. And even deeper than that, I should mention that the techs told me that the problem stemmed from the local “main office” in the town next to me, where they were trying to artificially manage the bandwidth kinda funky, and this problem I was having was more than likely affecting half the local population, but no one else bothered to call in.
So there. Pffff, or whatever other text means my sticking my tongue out and making obscene noises. See? This is a perfect example of why we as consumers should complain if things are not right. It wasn’t an isolated incident, but everyone else was just fine with being frustrated, while I actually took action.
So take action, dammit. Just not against me.
Applications out
A few nights ago, while I was taking up space at the Mother-in-Law’s house as she cleaned and did her thing, I cracked open the laptop, found a wireless network that liked the way I looked, and got busy sending out applications via monster.com and careerbuilder.com. I think I sent out about 8 applications or so, ranging from assistant Plant Manager of a building supply company to Store Manager at The Gap; Bed, Bath & Beyond; and Staples. Yeah, unfortunately, I couldn’t find an Apple Store up in the Eureka Area (wink wink). Which actually may be a good idea. Maybe I’ll have to use the good ol’ Apple Light to signal el Jobso to drop in and hear my great idea to “enlighten” the Norcal area, huh? Well, I’ll mull it around.
In the meantime, though, I’m just worryin’ about actually getting a job. I hate this online application BS. It’s so impersonal, and how do you check up on it? You’re basically just assigned a number, and dammit, I need someone to interview me in order to seal the deal. I need people contact, doggonit, and I’m not getting it this way.
Right now, I’m just hoping for one phone call. I’ll take the opportunity to go up for an interview, then I’ll go around the town while I’m up there and drop off applications in person, shake hands, and turn on the schmooze, because that’s where I excel, dammit, in face-to-face schmoozing. I’m just faking everything else.
Norcal Boonies Broadband
Since I mentioned Norcal & the Internet in the same blog already, I may as well share a thought/fear that I’ve had about my internet usage once I move: Namely, if I get some land far out and away like I want… how the hell am I going to get high-speed internet? Because at this point, especially since they fixed my line, I’m addicted. Everything goes faster, and that’s just the ticket for me.
So far as I know, You have to be relatively close to the main office to get DSL, which means crammed up like sardines with a whole bunch of people I don’t like (speculation here). Cable? Hopefully they’ll run a line to me, but I doubt it way out there. So then, satellite? Maybe my only option. But have you seen the prices on that shit? And it’s like only half as fast as what I currently get, to boot.
Basically what I’m saying is that there’s a distinct possibility that when I move up north I’ll have to give up porn.
Peace.
TV & Tattoos
Simpsons: The Movie; Here’s hopingBecause, um, the show has lost it. It hasn’t had it for years, honestly. I say this as I sit in front of the boob tube –which I’ll have you know is totally boobless without cable – with my eyes burning the un-funny dance in my head.
What happened? This show used to be cutting edge. But somewhere along the lines, they tempered the edge and just inserted butt jokes to take up space. See, this is why I like Family Guy so much, even though I’ll readily admit it hasn’t been as good since they canned it then brought it back. But at least it’s still edgy. They make fun of about anyone, especially the south, which is totally deserving.
But I’ve seen the previews of the movie. And ignoring the special visuals, I must say there seems to be some good humor in the big-screen flick. I hope it pans out that the best parts haven’t been shown already. I don’t want to have a cow or anything.
Pilot Episode of “The Winner”
Loser. What a loser. I’m sure that’s what they were going for, but so far, the first 10 minutes? I don’t care to hang around and watch and see if this lackluster excuse for comedy lasts another week.
No, seriously.
But the kid is good. Maybe the shining star of the show. Eh, we’ll see. They just told me that there’ll be a bonus episode after Family Guy. Did I mention I like that show?
New Ta2
See, that’s the new hip way of saying tattoo. Yeah, see, I got a new one. Which is to imply that it’s not my first, so skip the lecture about how stupid tattoos and how they are permanent, etc etc.
What is it? It’s ink that’s put under one’s skin by multiple needles many many many many times, over and over. Where have you been? These things have been around forever. Oh, what’s my tattoo, gotcha… It’s a Libra zodiac symbol, about the size of my fist, all black, on my right peck. Two guesses as to which month I was born in, if you want to take the challenge. And what made me decide to get this thing in this place?
Well, because I like pain. Ok, not really. You have to understand my philosophy on tattoos, and I guess this as good a place as any to learn, huh? OK, I feel that a tattoo should add a little bit of personality to you, not have a personality all its own, and should speak a certain truth about yourself; no fads, no fancy, no nothing like that. My first tattoo? My name, all black, across my shoulders on my back. This one is also all black, lacks any ornate-ness. They share simplicity, and they both reflect myself and certain inner truths, I feel. There’s no escaping who I am and where I came from (my name), and I happen to feel that I exemplify the qualities of Libra (being balance, fairness, and equity).
Then there’s the placement. I wanted to balance my back out, which meant something on the front. I don’t like things centered, unless it takes up the whole of something – like on my back – and if I got it that big it would be a) ugly, and b) not add a bit of personality, but take on a personality all its own, which is quite at odds with my tattoo philosophy (see above). So to a side it goes. And here’s where you’ll need a bit of background on my physique. I have a situation whereby my right peck is smaller than my left, most likely due to some sort of congenital deformation. I have discovered that it’s not as uncommon as I had thought (that it was just me). So, putting it on the right side, for whatever reason, makes my pecs look about identical. Way eery.
New Ta2 Redux
Ow ow ow OW OW! This guy ripped me up, man! I am NOT going back there for my next tattoo in a few weeks. Geebus, he was rough. I mean, It’s bad enough that you have needles going in and out and in and out of your skin, but this guy was pushing hard and going fast, which equated to pulling my skin as well as puncturing. And it hurt. Badly. Have I mentioned it was painful?
The next tattoo? “nosce te ipsum,” which is latin for “Know thyself.” Why? Because I think it’s important that we each are comfortable with who we are. And we should have an idea of who that is.
Then there’s the one on the arm. Hard to describe, but think cavemen figurines, all the same, except for one. Oh, and the one/two on the leg. Haven’t figured those out quite yet. I have a basic idea, but the details could shift. But we can bet they’ll be plain, black, and have some truth to them.
Peace.